Funny PMs...

Q: How big is your clit?
A: No offence, but why should I tell you?
Q: Just wanted to know
A: Well, it's a long answer
Q: Tell me please
A: Clitorises come in many different sizes and shapes. In many women, the head of the clitoris, or glans, is about the same size and shape as a pea, but some are smaller and some are bigger — some are as large as a small finger. The head of the clitoris may be hidden within the folds of the labia, barely poking out, or it may hang far below them. The clitoris varies in color from pink to brownish black. All these variations are normal. The head of the clitoris sits at the end of a long internal shaft and network of nerves that extend up to five inches inside the body. The shaft separates into two legs that straddle each side of the vagina. Many people do not realise but the major part of the clitoris (female equivalent to the penis) is stored internally. You may see just a pea-sized thing externally, but there could be up to 5 inches internally, maybe more. In other words, many women have bigger 'dicks' than some men...
Q: Oh. Okay. So you have a bigger dick than me. Thanks for answering.

*SWEET*

some of them are really very funny. thanks for sharing them

You're welcome Sexghost and thank you. Here are some more...

Q: You're a Man City fan?
A: Yup
Q: Why not Man Utd?
A: Because I support Man City
Q: Are you a poof?
A: Yup, I love dick
Q: So your a poof?
A: By your definition I suppose so...
Q: But your profile sez your a girl
A: I am
Q: So how can you be a poof then
A: I fuck girls too
Q: Gotta meet more City fans
A: Cool

I LIKED THAT ONE!

Q: Did ne one tell u that u look like cameron diaz?
A: yeah, when I was thinner
Q: You still do even though your fat
A: You think I'm fat?
Q: No thats not what I meant. Just if your bigger now you still look like her
A: You're not very good at compliments, are you?
Q: No sorry. I'm not used to this
A: Do you have a girlfriend?
Q: No
A: Advice sweetheart - next time you try to talk to a girl, keep the compliments but DON'T mention the 'F' word
Q: Whats the F word?
A: FAT. FUCKING FAT. JUST DON'T SAY IT, OKAY????
Q: Okay I won't. Please dont be cross
A: Sorry. Just mention a girl's GOOD points, yeah?
Q: Okay. Thanks for advice

*BLESS HIM*

Q: How many guys have you fucked?
A: Some
Q: No go on tell me
A: Why?
Q: cos I wanna know
A: Why do you want to know? What difference would it make?
Q: Just wanna know
A: Sorry, not telling!
Q: So how many girls have you fucked?
A: Some
Q: Just tell me
A: Why?
Q: cos I really wanna know
A: Why do you 'really' want to know?
Q: Just do
A: In that case, you like to see lots of pics of naked girls?
Q: Oh yea
A: You want me to tell you a website that has some of my pics?
Q: Sure
A: www.whatboyswant.com

Surely some other people have received some funny PMs? Maybe you've deleted them? If you can remember, please post them. I'm not trying to embarrass the guys that sent them (which is why screen names are blocked).
I received a couple from a guy today and it was really funny, but unfortunately, if I posted the messages, his screen name would be very obvious...

Q: I like all your pictures you are very hot women.
A: Thanks
Q: Will you do modelling for me?
A: Maybe. Where are you from? What kind of modelling?
Q: I am in Georgia. Maybe I crucify you
A: Georgia? USA? And CRUCIFY me???
Q: Only make beleive and I am in Georgia old part of Soviet Republic
A: So you want me to travel to Georgia, get nails stuck through my hands and feet, be tortured then go home again?
Q: Not nails Is ropes.
A: And that's supposed to make me feel better?
Q: Sorry Maybe I have problems with langauge. I pay you come to Georgia and you are photo for me crucified
A: Sorry, not really my thing.

Maybe you should change your screen name to Madonna.

The only funny ones I've gotten so far went like this:
****: Is your avatar your GF??
Me: No, but my GF did give me the pic.
****: Well, do you know the girl?
Me: No, my GF just sent it to me.
****: Oh. Well, do you know where I could find her?

(I assume he meant pictures, but who knows... )

...And so on. I've gotten quite a few like this. One in-tell-y-junt PM'er even went so far as to suggest that it was ME.

PS--Love the "Brit" humor, it's just a little too blunt over here

that mouse needs to go

Thanks for that Mo.

And franklin - which mouse? There are TWO of them! It's my favourite avatar so far and was made for me especially. I might change it sometime though.

Sorry franklin, but the mice are awesome. I remember watching that with my little brother.
(Sigh)
Good times.

Okay, another couple...

Q: Hiya sexy. What's your job?
A: Being sexy *lol*
Q: No but really what do you do?
A: I work in a lab
Q: What kind of thing do you do in a lab?
A: I test things for bacteria, viral infections and other fauna.
Q: So what do you test?
A: Urine, faeces, sputum, wound seepages, semen, cerebro-spinal fluids, etc.
Q: You're not sexy anymore

Quote:

Originally posted by BiBiBaby

Okay, another couple...

Q: Hiya sexy. What's your job?
A: Being sexy *lol*
Q: No but really what do you do?
A: I work in a lab
Q: What kind of thing do you do in a lab?
A: I test things for bacteria, viral infections and other fauna.
Q: So what do you test?
A: Urine, faeces, sputum, wound seepages, semen, cerebro-spinal fluids, etc.
Q: You're not sexy anymore

hehehe,,,, guess he had no stomach for it,,,,

Q: Can I ask you a question?
A: You just did
Q: An embarrassing one.
A: Who will be embarrassed?
Q: Mainly me I think.
A: Hmmm... okay...
Q: Do you think it's normal for a guy to wear girls panties and masturbate while looking at your pictures?
A: On this site it's probably normal

..good thread...i have 10 pages of p.m.'s but no funny ones like these!!

Thanks azdesertrat Trouble is, in the first six months of being here, I seem to have attracted all the strange PMs. I don't mind at all though, as they provide funny content for this thread!

Fab! and i thought it was just me got the funnies! xx

Quote:

Originally posted by BiBiBaby

Q: Can I ask you a question?
A: You just did
Q: An embarrassing one.
A: Who will be embarrassed?
Q: Mainly me I think.
A: Hmmm... okay...
Q: Do you think it's normal for a guy to wear girls panties and masturbate while looking at your pictures?
A: On this site it's probably normal

Thats fuckin creeeeeepy.

Quote:

Originally posted by monicamonica

Fab! and i thought it was just me got the funnies! xx

Monica - why not post some in this thread? If you do, please hide the identity of whoever PM'd you!