Interesting/Funny/Amusing News.

Quote:

Originally posted by Demodad68

Cool, I'm moving to MASS. and buying myself an eye patch...

Arrrgh.

Again, I've been super busy this past month, so I haven't had a chance to post news on the frontpage (or in here), but here are some of the interesting things I've come across in the last few weeks...

Ohio man charged for barking at police dog.

Clock powers itself by trapping and digesting flies.

Swedish flamingoes massacred by anteater

Religion may go extinct in 9 countries

Men made obsolete: Sperm grown in petri dish

Company to pay mortgages in return for painting your house into a big advertisement

Taint length linked to fertility

Biologists grow retina from embryonic stem cells

Scientists create artificial leaf (that's 10x more efficient than real leaves)

ShamWow's Vince sued; allegations that he was trying to keep his assistant as a "love slave". You followin' me, camera guy?

Plane contrails more damaging to environment than carbon dioxide

Man offering free naked rubdowns and pretending to be massage parlor investigator arrested.

High school baseball players sacrifice live chickens to improve their team. They got cut from the team, so apparently the voodoo failed.

In 'dog bites man' type of news: Study says attractive women expect men to pay for dinners.

VW Jetta's recalled because honking horn turns them off

US Senators demand more porn/obscenity prosecutions. This is what the US Senate spends it's time on?

Judges give harsher sentences before lunch, more lenient after lunch.

Man catches fire while watching porn

12 Year old boy arrested over spilled milk

Scientists create barcode-reader that reads Zebras

Woman bites off dude's testicles during a fight

Mailman delivers special package; poops in man's yard.

Real-life-sized Barbie doll is kind of scary. She could probably still get it though.

Man dresses up as mannequin, hides in women's bathroom taking creeper pictures. Is arrested.

College professor in trouble for including strippers & lap dances in a symposium.

Zombie fungus craves ant brains

AC/DC says their music catalog will never be available for download. The rest of the internet goes, "lol"

Man catches fire in a porn shop. Was probably smited by God.

17 Year old boy arrested for ranking girls on facebook.

Largest Bit-torrent lawsuit ever targets 23,000 people who have downloaded the lastest shitty Sylvester Stallone movie.

Chimpanzees have at least 66 documented meaningful gestures

Scientists create that electronic paper from Minority Report

US Senator Chuck Schumer proposes a "no-ride" list for train passengers.

Armadillos are one of the very few animals that can give you leprosy. (Humans are the other. I suggest avoiding both, just to be safe)

NY Law would make it a crime to buy knock-off purses and watches. Punishable by one year in jail. For buying a fake handbag.


Men in a bar mistake sign language for gang signs, stab deaf man.

Chicago Pizzarias running a cocaine ring.

Woman from Dubai sues husband for $12,ooo,ooo for withholding sex. Let me repeat that: She sued him, because he wouldn't sex her.

Woman buys prostitute for her 80 yr old father. Is arrested.

Texas neighborhood all kinds of upset because someone has a replica statute of David in their yard. Yes, a replica of a classic art piece is generating controversy because people are stupid.

18 Yr old man dresses up as a cow, crawls around WalMart and tries to steal 26 gallons of milk.

Florida bans baggy pants and bestiality. I object to one of those bans. I'm not going to say which though. You have to figure it out for yourself.

Anorexia is linked to spring births.

Pigs have evolved to love mud

Strippers successfully sue Gentlemen's Club over minimum wage infractions

Powerful women are as likely to cheat on their spouse as are men

Man completes model of San Fransisco made out of toothpicks. Took him 37 years and 100,000 toothpicks!

Doctors in Florida start refusing to treat fat people

Hawaii bill may ban use of cellphones while walking

Israeli couple names their child "Like" after the Facebook button.

Airline tells woman and daughter that they're too fat to fly. Later they say they're sorry.

Postman drops off a package in someone's yard. And by 'drops off a package' I mean he took a shit.

Thailand jungles mask surprise rise in Tiger populations. A happy news item for a change!


Bitcoin P2P currency: The most dangerous project we've ever seen

100 Watt LED lightbulbs emerge as ban on incandescent 100W bulbs looms. The bad news: They're going to be like $50 each

Tiny turbines inside arteries could power pacemakers


Researchers find small particles can flow up waterfalls

Dead skin cells can help clear air pollution

How to spot a psychopath

Children becoming weaker as computer entertainment becomes more popular

The brains of Apple Fanbois look like those of religious fanatics

Pejazzling: Vajazzling for men.

Man wins $2,000,000 in lottery. Stays on Food Stamps

RIAA wants legislation to allow them to search and seize bootlegging operations without warrants.

Lawyer objects to large breasted "paralegal"

Pornstar's grave is "too sexy" says cemetary

Should animal conservationists allow some species to die out?

US to store passenger data of international travelers for 15 years.

Drinking Alcohol may help guard against Dementia

Man joins the mile high club. By himself. While sitting next to an 18 year old girl. Is caught by airline. Faces criminal charges.

Electrons are nearly perfect spheres. Sort of. Because you can't really think of them as actual objects.

Student punished for his religious beliefs at school. It should be noted that his chosen religion is Pastafarianism.

Chinese prisoners are forced to play videogames to earn money via "Gold farming" for the prisons.

Scientists discover "earth equivalent" amount of water on the moon.

Why parts of the brain are named after genitalia. From the article, "...the human brain was once described as comprising its very own vulva, penis, testicles, buttocks and even an anus. In fact, part of the cerebrum is still named in honor of long forgotten whores."

Utah makes acting sexy illegal

Monkeys protect Indian government officials

Apple brand causes same reaction in brain as religion does. I always suspected Apple fanboys were some sort of cult. Now science proves it.

How artificial light has forever changed the way humans see and live

Women find happy men less attractive than grumpy guys.

New Zealand trucker falls onto an air hose; is turned into a human balloon.

Dancing is outlawed at the Jefferson Memorial in Washington DC. I'm not sure how a public monument is a "nonpublic forum" but as one commenter at that site put it: "This memorial is dedicated to honoring America’s foremost champion of free speech. It’s not a place where you can just express anything you want!!"

New York City to ban smoking in "public outdoor areas." This includes all NY public parks and such. You'll still be allowed to smoke in parking lots though, so consider yourself lucky to have that, if you're a smoker, I guess.

Sheep diagnoses woman with breast cancer

Tennessee law bans "images that cause distress." No more linking people to lemonparty or goatse in Tennessee, I suppose.

Mexican drug gangs are kidnapping bus passengers and making them fight to the death like gladiators.

Proposed bill wants to ban lip-synching on youtube

Funniest crime of the year.

Best interview ever:

[youtube]iheOMq8UkN4[/youtube]

Schools May Punish Students for Off-Campus, Online Speech

Seattle Supreme Court says it's ok to fire people who use medical marijuana

Woman develops foreign accent after having oral surgery

Ice Cream Trucks get into turf war. One tries to drive the other off the road.

Teenager sells one of his kidneys for an iPad 2

Homophobic men are the ones most turned on by gay pr0n

Russia's crazy flesh-eating drug epidemic. Youtube has some horrendous videos of this stuff if you're interested.

World's Oceans are in "Shocking Decline"

Road Rage in Russia

China "Steals" Austrian Village and Lake - Really, they're just building an exact replica of the Austrian Town, which is kind of weird...and possibly illegal

Women Flock to NZ Pub to Drink Horse Semen Shots

New service to give drunken facebook photos to employers conducting background checks.

World's First Dog fitted with Prosthetic Paws - Video Below:

[youtube]6z_LZWk34xI[/youtube]

Big ISPs nearing agreement on piracy crackdown

The "Man Flu" is real

75% of America's Nuclear Reactors emit radioactive tritium in undetectable underground leaks.


For those in the US who didn't know: Fort Calhoun Nuclear Power Plant had an electrical fire due to flooding, which caused knocked out the cooling process for the spent fuel rods. The Airspace over the plant was closed by the FAA and, according to a leaked IAEA report, the Obama administration has ordered a complete press blackout of the situation.


Are Predator Drones coming to the Skies above the US?

Honeybees may have emotions

Memory Chip allows researchers to control the memory of rats

Drug Cartels upping their violence: Kidnapping passengers from buses and making them fight to the death, Gladiator style.

Why is it those unbreakable security codes are either getting breached or are not in use? Because governments say so.

Mutant Bunny From Fukushima Freaks everyone out. Adorably.

[youtube]UqVY9azhH3U[/youtube]

Children in Irish Government Care ended up in Brothels

University Physics Professor accused of running Prostitution Website

A few that I missed last time:

Woman dies at her own funeral

TSA Searches coming to Cars, Subways, Ferry boats, Buses and Planes near you! (If you're in the US, that is)

And what does the TSA do with all that stuff the confiscate? They sell it for a tidy profit!

Whoops. (red face)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2ibZQABXow[/youtube]

Don't have time to put all these on the front page today:

Birds have language:

Baby Parrots Learn their Name from their Parents
Finches Tweet with Grammar and Scold those who don't.

Woman is paid to become massively obese

How Google (and the internet in general) is changing our memories

Pastafarian wins the right to wear a pasta strainer on his head in his drivers license photo

A funny paper from the Helsinki Center for Economic Research explaining how a nation's GDP is correlated to the penis size of their males:

Quote:

The size of male organ is found to have an inverse U-shaped
relationship with the level of GDP in 1985. It can alone explain over 15% of the variation in
GDP. The GDP maximizing size is around 13.5 centimetres, and a collapse in economic
development is identified as the size of male organ exceeds 16 centimetres. Economic
growth between 1960 and 1985 is negatively associated with the size of male organ, and it
alone explains 20% of the variation in GDP growth.

A Daily Pill Can Prevent HIV infection

Woman cuts off husband's penis, throws it in the garbage disposal.

Bike seat that prevents erectile dysfunction slow to catch on. I guess some guys like having limp noodles?

7500 Earthquakes in 10 months

Parasitic Wasp Creates Zombie Ladybug which it then uses to Guard it's Nest

It seems it's relatively easy to trigger a mass extinction. Uh-oh.

Knights in Shining Armor Probably had Terrible BO. Study which involves people wearing knight armor on treadmills.

In Los Angeles, if your dog chases somebody, it can be labeled as vicious and killed

Man fined $2,000 for not watering his beehive

Zombie lady bug...fucking tiiiight.

Internet Explorer Users are Dumber - Kanzen nods his head in agreement.

Sheep are relatively smart.

Once 10% of society holds a belief (regardless of whether it's right or wrong) that belief will catch on within that society.

South Dakota town for sale. Buy the whole town of Scenic for less than a million bucks!

The Catholic Church's Secret Gay Cabal

Toxic Slime Shuts French Beaches. They Hydrogen Sulfate it releases as it decomposes also seems to have killed a bunch of animals.

Woman sues government after being injured while having sex on work trip

Woman assaults another woman with a bratwurst

New Twitter Algorithm could out Guys Pretending to be Lesbians

You should tryout for our new News Mod.

Ohwaitnevermind.

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

[ Link ] - Kanzen nods his head in agreement.

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[ Link ]. Buy the whole town of Scenic for less than a million bucks!

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[ Link ]. They Hydrogen Sulfate it releases as it decomposes also seems to have killed a bunch of animals.

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Thanks EL! Some entertaining reading!

I don't usually post single pieces of news in here, since I like to wait and punch a bunch at once, but:

Woman Kills Boyfriend with Stiletto Heel to his Head