ten tiny true stories about my life

> I have been in three serious traffic accidents two of which I walked away from with minor injuries and the others required to be rushed to the hospital via ambulance or helicopter. The third was a motorcycle accident in front of a gravel truck that I walked away from after sliding 100" down the highway, only receiving a broken foot and wrist.

2> I am an adrenaline junkie (climbed high voltage towers, bungie jumped, skydived, jumped off of bridges greater than 40', ridden my motorcycle over 150MPH on several occasions)

3> Lost my virginity at 14

4> As a going into the Navy present my father bought me a $100/hr 27 year old call girl.

5> I am the principle cause of an undercover narcotics agent's divorce. (He is better off now but probably doesn't realize it.)

6> I love playing with ingredients that go boom.

7> I have had death threats against me. (See # 5)

8> I own way too many weapons. (See #7)

9> I have been shocked by both 220 and 440 V AC in the same day.

10> I distrust almost all police but worked with them daily.

1. I used to be afraid of grass
2. I couldnt tie my shoes until I was 14
3. I like to play with army men when nobodys watching
4. Ive been raped 4 times
5. I just cant sleep with any clothes on, just doesnt happen
6. Ive never ridden a bike, but I know I can
7. I once broke into my school and destroyd some computers
8. I read EVERYTHIN i see on the bathroom
9. My first real kiss was at 4 year old
10. I had my first drink of alcahol at 9 and drugs at 12...

Quote:

Originally posted by Mr.Poop

5.i met my current girlfreind at a model railroaders convention.she was there with her brother.


so thats it if anyone wants to tell ten tiny true stories about there life feel free

love poop

now THAT is some funny ass shit

Quote:

Originally posted by NaughtyGypsy

1. I danced professional tap, ballet and jazz for 11 years.
2. I'm 25 years old and I've moved >50 but <100 times.
3. I watch all the disney movies with my kids. I think I like them more than they do.
4. I would rather clean the toilet than do the dishes.
5. I lost my virginity by rape at the age of 12 at a local swimming pond, 2 days before I was planning to have my first time with my then-boyfriend.
6. I'm a pyromaniac that fears fire. I'll stare at flames for hours on end, but I'm ultra cautious about fire.
7. My mom blew up the front half of my house with a kerosene heater when she was staying with me in '03. (Prolly explains the above)
8. I was beaten by my daughter's father almost daily while I was pregnant. He broke my front teeth so badly, it'll cost thousands to fix. I couldn't bail until my mom came to WA from AZ and pulled me out after the baby was born. He broke 2 of her ribs in the process before the cops actually showed up.
9. I grew up with mechanics and auto body men. I sold my 1st transmission (without a crank!) when I was 7.
10. I have NEVER ridden in a limo, gotten roses or been out of the mainland USA. (I live about 60 miles from Mexico and I've never been!)

Crazy Stuff! If what you say is true then stay strong! It will get better! If nothing else come to this site and vent. Ill rate 5 everytime

Quote:

Originally posted by assman3

1) I lost my virginity at 12 to my aunt. I later found out she wasnt my aunt just distant friend of the family!
2)I tried to smoke a cigarette at about age of 12 and burnt off my eye lashes
3)Me and a friend once shot about 100 new cars windows out with 22 rifles that were passing by on a train.
4)When I was 16 I banged a 32 yo and got caught by her husband, he wasnt mad !
5)I got married at around 20yo her mom tried to give me head we are now divorced!
6)I once banged a girl while her fiance was in the other room on the computer then drank a beer with him later he was cluless.
7)I got drunk and was speeding the cops got after me and I ran. They couldnt catch me then there was a helicopter flying around with the spotlight. I was never caught! But I did have to hide my car and hitch a ride to work for the next week!
8)I once had a black cat (firecracker) blow up in my hand removing my thumb nail and splitting my pointer finger.
9)I once flew upside down in a two passenger airplane and damn near got sick!
10) I fucked a chick up the ass and made her get pregnant! It caused her ass to grow alot thats why Im assman the 3 is because it grew 3 times larger

2)I tried to smoke a cigarette at about age of 12 and burnt off my eye lashes
3)Me and a friend once shot about 100 new cars windows out with 22 rifles that were passing by on a train.
7)I got drunk and was speeding the cops got after me and I ran. They couldnt catch me then there was a helicopter flying around with the spotlight. I was never caught! But I did have to hide my car and hitch a ride to work for the next week!
8)I once had a black cat (firecracker) blow up in my hand removing my thumb nail and splitting my pointer finger.
9)I once flew upside down in a two passenger airplane and damn near got sick!

Ones I kinda believed..only because they make you out to be a criminal and a moron, which I can accept.

wow someone besides me likes army men(i collect army men)

1. I want to write a book one day.
2. I played baseball against Josh Beckett(boston red sox)
3. I went to Culinary School for 2 years.
4. I used to play Yu-Gi-Oh cards, lmao.
5. Tivo is my favorite invention since the internet.
6. I've broken each of my arms 3 times.
7. I played high school and high level baseball until I threw my arm out.
8. I didn't kiss a girl until i was 17.
9. I've met Jessica Simpson, while she was wearing a bikini!
10. My friend and I burnt down the side of a road and 2 whole trees playing with fireworks.

1. My first fuck was in a foreign country and i was drunk as hell.

2. I once asked my cousin to watch me fuck a really ugly girl just to prove that I can get a woody anytime, anyplace.

3. I'm addicted to chocolates.

4. While doing parade training for ROTC, I accidentally swallowed a few bugs that flew up unexpectedly.

5. My laptop is called porn.

6. I once got drunk in a strip club and spent the night in a house full of strippers coz i couldn't drive home.

7. I got chased by a goat when I was 15.

8. I graduated from university without learning anything.

9. I almost had a threesome with a hot chick and her less hotter but much younger sister but my dad called and i had to pick my brother up from the airport

10. I sleep beside my shotgun.

1. Have never broken a bone, had stitches, or had a cavity.
2. Never been arrested or gotten a ticket.
3. Have driven a dark back road at 75 MPH with a girlfriend grinding away on me.
4. Know a guy who beat his wife with a baseball bat, then later snuck into her hospital room and killed her with cyanide...was then sentenced to death.
5. Was at a party where a decent looking girl was taking guy after guy upstairs...when she came down and asked when i was gonna take my turn I told her to move the fuck away from the TV there's a Syracuse-Georgetown game on.
6. Gave a girl a ride home after she offered and gave a blowjob for it.
7. Have driven home so drunk I couldn't make it out of the car until noon.
8. In high school, I was the idiot at every party that would steal someone's smokes, grab a couple beers, and climb a tree...and then piss on anyone who came near the tree.
9. Married my first "real" girlfriend who I met when I was 14. Still together 26 years later. And damn happy.
10. Corrupted my religious conservative Southern friends. They stopped by on their way through on part of their honeymoon....several drinks, raunchy talk, a porn in the VCR, dirty jokes.....bye bye religion, hello foursome.

1) I tossed a message in a bottle in the Atlantic Ocean that was answered 7 years later. From Spain
2) First, middle, and last name all begin with same letter
3) Deaf in left ear.
4) Broke family TV day of Super bowl at age 8
5) Have NO business working in the field I do. (Manipulated drug screening)
6) Believe God is a woman, if there is a “God”
7) Flew commercial airlines two times: Taxied for take off w/rear door open, and flew threw Hurricane and became weightless during wind shear for 5 seconds
8) Really believe the Washington Nationals in 2 years will be baseballs next dynasty
9) Prefers “8 Stories about me” forum posts
10) Lives with movie stars daughters “ex”

got chased by a goat lmmfgdao !

1. I lost my virginity at 21 (late developer and wayyyyy too much of a geek before then)
2. I have dislocated my left knee 11 times
3. I have performed stand up comedy in front of and audience of 200 people
4. I nearly died at the start of February 2008 from a ruptured proximal artery
5. I slept my way into a job
6. Before I met my wife, I had a two year relationship with a married woman 11 years my senior
7. I have had a bottle broken over my head in a fight (It fucking hurt in case you're wondering)
8. My first car was a mark 1 ford fiesta
9. I was an extra in the film 'In the Name of the Father' (I was in the crowd scene at the start)
10. When I was 7 Jeff Wayne's War of the Worlds album scared the shit out of me so much my dad had to sell it.

that avatar kicks ass
i love peanuts

@NG

@ dave dude shes got a man

Quote:

Originally posted by biggins10

@ dave dude shes got a man

Not trying to pick her up, I read her post and felt like sending some roses, even if they are virtual.

1) My senior year of high school, I was in 3 car accidents. I wasn't driving in any of them.
2) My sister once broke a broom handle on the back of my neck.
3) I read 4 or 5 books a week.
4) I own nearly 1200 books and close to 3000 comic books.
5) I've only had one relationship that lasted longer than 3 months.
6) That relationship lasted 6 months and was a pure S&M relationship with virtually no actual sex.
7) In 1996 I had a cyst removed from my neck the size of a baseball. I have a scar that goes from behind my left ear to just under my chin.
8) I'd rather have sex with married women than be in a relationship.
9) The only bone I've ever broken is the pinkie on my right hand.
10) When I was a kid I got the ass whooping of a lifetime for throwing rocks at my neighbor's daughter while she was jogging.

1) I've had sex with women from 3 different countries, for you folks who live in Europe doesn't mean a thing but living in the US and having mostly American girls around its different.
2) I nearly died twice when I was a toddler (was going to fall from a balcony and had a coin stuck in my throat) -don't even ask- and both times was saved by the same cousin.
3) I was an extra on the movie "The Day After Tomorrow"
4) I've had sex in 5 different countries, a bus, and right next to my then girlfriend's brother who was asleep.
5) I love dogs and babies and hate children and cats
6) I've only dated hot women and I'm not good looking at all
7) Me and my friends nearly burned down our private High School, the elementary school kids that saw us told the teachers but were blamed for it, the faculty didn't believe them haha suckas'
8) I lived in Europe rent-free for 6 months, girl I dated was completely in love w/me and paid for that and more (she was rich though) paid her w/sex haha
9) I'm a sucker for History (books, TV shows, movies, museums)
10) Once I fucked a girl for 7 hrs (on and off) just took a break after the 5th, slept for 4 hrs and continued until the 9th. Came all 9 times. It's not BS I've never been able to break that mark and I don't think I'll ever will

Quote:

Originally posted by rainbowdemon

1. I have three grandchildren. And I can still get a boner when I need one.

perhaps you should have done those on different numbers