boyfriend wants anal.what to do to change his mind

There's only one way to a satisfying relationship, that's where each person is willing to put the other's happiness before their own. That's called love. Everything else is business.

A guy that won't take no for an answer will never make you happy. Get rid of him. There are millions (billions) of other men in the world.

PS I didn't understand that at your age, and I had to pay for it dearly before I wised up and started actually caring about people. Then the sun came out in my life big time (and stayed out!).

If you truly don't like the idea of having anal sex, that's your choice, but the unpleasant things you described were most likely a result of improper preparation and can be avoided by taking your time, using the right lube, and flushing your lower intestine with an enema.

Have you asked him if he's ever had anything up his ass other than his doctor's digit in a prostate exam? If the, uh, shoe were on the other foot, would he be comfortable or willing to have his butt invaded and penetrated, repeatedly?... He probably HAS watched too much porn on this, and is hot to do it. It's your body, and if you are serious about this guy and your future with him, you should be honest in your refusal of something you don't want.
I cast my vote with the firm ""I don't want to" approach...but, there also is much stength in just saying "NO!" and not yielding to his "but it you really loved me, you'd do this for me..." argument...if you haven't heard that one yet, you probably will...
He should have enough respect for you to accept your refusal for anal sex, and if he doesn't...you should lose him for good. Any guy that forces you to engage in something that you strongly don't want is not a keeper, and not worthy of you, either. If he argues that you don't know if you like it or not until you try it, you can say that you tried it with a vibrator once out of curiousity, and it just hurt 'way too much, and you are totally not interested in going there again.. You can refuse this without confessing or admitting that you have allowed a guy to do it previously. That's your personal business and something you should not feel required to share...If this guy continues to push for anal sex in spite of all your protests and refusals...you should give serious consideration to ending the relationship...he obviously doesn't respect you and he probably never will, and if you give in, he's likely to respect you even less, and think that he can get anything and everything he wants...and you just don't want to even think about going there...believe me.
Good luck with your dilemma...I hope things work out for you...

we had never used any lubicrant or something,not even a condom.but i have ckecked now myself for STDs

NO ONE has the right to force you to do something like this. If you say no, it means no. if he keeps on at you show him the door. Trust me there are a lot of much better guys out there and as you say you are only 18, why put up with this type of shit. It's your body you should be the only one to decide what goes into it and where it goes.

take care and I hope you can sort this out with out any more pain.

keep safe

Frist of all, it's your choice, if he can't respect that he's a jerk
Anal can be great if you go slow, use lots of lube, maybe toys to open things up like a butt plug, and are in the right mood
If he's into anal inform him it's just as pleasureable for men to recieve, he should be willing to try a little anal play and maybe a strpaon himself if he wants you to try it. try http://www.take-it-like-a-man.com/

I hear it's even more pleasurable for men

You need to go to a sex shop. I know they have them there because I've been to them. They are very professional, polite and no one's there to judge people. If you're not comfortable with going to a place like that then I'd say you're not ready to even be trying things like anal sex. You're still young and I'm sure a lot of your likes and dislikes about sex will still change with time so if you're not ready then you're not ready.

Just take it slow. You said you're hot and have a nice body so finding a good guy shouldn't be a problem. Chances are you're comfortable with this guy and that's always the downfall with women. They get comfortable in a relationship and get too scared to leave. Men can be like this to though.

Natasa; You have to use LOTS of lubirication! That is probablly why it hurt and where the bleeding comes from!

It sounds to me like your problem is the guys you are choosing. Not all men have hygiene problems and in fact only the nasty ones do. I shave and clean myself very regularly. My wife and all past girlfriends have all loved giving me head and definitely wouldn't describe it anywhere near as terrible as you did. In fact my wife gets more turned on giving me head then anything I can do to her.

The other possible problem is maybe you just don't enjoy sexual things. I've known a few girls who just don't like sex at all and view it as a job instead of fun. From some of the things you've said in this thread this sounds like it could be some of your problem. Everytime you've spoken of a sexual act in this thread you've had a very negative view toward the whole thing. Of course this could also be because you've never been with a decent guy. A good guy will worry more about your pleasure in bed then his own and if you haven't been with a guy like this yet then keep looking and try dating guys totally opposite of the ones you've been picking. You may just have really bad taste in men.

Personally I'm not into anal but I have done it and lube is a MUST. That's probably the majority of your problem right there as everyone else has said. The pussy makes it's own lubrication, the ass does not. The more lube the better. The more slippery you can make it the less tearing and pain you'll experience.

But,please tell why do you like anal?(those of you that do like it)

And lube isn't a turn off for the guys?

........damned. did i read all that now???


in my opinion you've the wrong man love. kick him out and try an older one - he WILL KNOW what you like and what is good for you.
sorry, but experience is irreplaceable.

regards, paul

Lube isn't a turn off at all! It creates are smooth gentle surface between you and helps eliminate the friction on raw / bare skin. Lube feels great, even with conventional sex.

I wouldn't say that I LOVE anal sex, it is just one of those things that most guys want to try. Espically if you have a nice ASS!!!!

mycurrent boyfriend is a lot older.he is 21

Quote:

Originally posted by Natasa

mycurrent boyfriend is a lot older.he is 21

i didn't mean "older", i meaned "OLDER"!!!
have you ever had sex with a real man - not a youngster finding out what to do?

what is cothf??????????and why so proud of it?

Quote:

Originally posted by Natasa

what is cothf??????????and why so proud of it?

lol **
http://whatboyswant.com/forum_read/4443716/1/10/I_am_an_Avowed_Avid_Bush_Lover_Club_of_the_Hairy_fraction.html

but this don't answer my question!!

He seems already anal, get him a Ho Ho Ho for a pressy

Muad,i think that a much older man will look for only sex with a girl that young

As for COTHF,you'll love me!!SEE POST 27 AND 30!!I wish there were men in greece like you...

For me the hair would be more of an issue then you not liking anal.

Every guy has things they like/need and things they don't care about. The idea is to find a partner who's into the same kind of stuff as you. For me shaving /waxing is crucially important but anal isn't important at all. So I would never date a hairy girl who likes anal because it just wouldn't work.

I just think you need to find a guy who's more in line with what you like. No anal, lots of hair and clean.

Quote:

Originally posted by Natasa

Muad,i think that a much older man will look for only sex with a girl that young

As for COTHF,you'll love me!!SEE POST 27 AND 30!!I wish there were men in greece like you...

maybe they're/we're looking out for sex with a young girl ...but trust me, but as i told you, experience is irreplaceable. and therefore you will like it - and get another view.

@cothf: prove to me!