Ask Me About being EL.

Quote:

Originally posted by CatBack

What Audi do you drive?
(C'mon RS4!)

Will this itch go away?

Are the Flyers still your favorite team?

If you could have 1 animal as a pet, what would it be?

Any tattoos or piercings?

If you were a woodchuck and could chuck wood, how much wood would you chuck?

2001 A6 2.7T

With some ointment and time, perhaps. I suggest not being with unclean women, however.

Yes.

If hot chicks don't count, I suppose a puppy dog. Although chicks should count, especially since Bob Guccione calls them "pets" and that's in a major magazine. In fact, it's probably less of a magazine and more of a scholarly journal.

Nope. My body is a temple, or something like that.

If I were a woodchuck I wouldn't chuck wood, I'd hang out with the beavers.

Quote:

Originally posted by 4tookerplace

So, Billy Joel fans like his music, but prefer young attractive men?

What's the farthest distance you've ever walked?

Do you find film of bears catching salmon as amusing as I do?(bears catching salmon rates 10/10 with me)

Fresh garlic?

Ever punch an animal?

Wait, what? I mean, just because I like the Piano man doesn't mean I'm going to suck off some guy in a dark alley or anything.

I used to have a job where I walked all over a hospital, and while I never wore a pedometer or anything, I'd have to say I walked probably up to 10 miles a day pretty regularly. That kind of sucked.

Nah. I'm not a big fan of those crazy wildlife videos, like where a zebra is walking across a river and gets gutted by an alligator. It's just like, meh, I didn't need to see that.

Not by itself. I'm not going to bite into a garlic clove like an apple or anything, but on some dishes it can be quite tasty.

Nope. I had a police horse head butt my face though. That hurt like a motherfucker, because the metal bit in his mouth caught the corner of my eye. Stupid horse.

Quote:

Originally posted by cooper.

Have you ever made love to a piece of fruit?

No, but a kumquat eye-fucked the shit out of me once.

Quote:

Originally posted by DarthSocal

New questions:

How did it feel losing to me in your own sport (well at least in the fantasy world)?
Do you really expect your baseball team to stay at the top for long?
Are fireworks legal where you live (almost entirely banned in So Cal, fucking bullshit)?

It felt shitty since I lost Gagne because of his mush head.

Come and get me, m&m.

No. The only kind they let us have are the ones that don't leave the ground, which is fucking lame. I mean, I don't follow those rules, and use my vast network of underworld connections to pick up some real fireworks that can blow some shit up, but still, it's dumb that I'm not allowed to blow myself up if I wish. HELP, HELP, I'M BEING OPPRESSED!

Quote:

Originally posted by Xandar

EL- I know you didn't answer my first question. But I do have another, how many screen names does "Jack" have and and did he create them before or after he started bitching about spoofs?

He has probably about 15, some of which are demigods, despite his pleas for people to believe that his internet popularity on a porn site isn't important to him.

And before, because hypocrisy is his middle name. Well part of it. Dickydoo-douch-hypocrisy is the full middle name. Has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

he's back and he's burning up the screen

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

No, but a kumquat eye-fucked the shit out of me once.

Good stuff...

Quote:

Originally posted by ItsaPinkMoon

I posted more questions... yet they're deleted? ...hmmmm

(( now to remember what they were: ))

physical fight or verbal fight?

punch Jack in the face or kick him in the balls?

Poodle, really? Not something like a freakin' Great Dane or even a Goldendoodle (which is part poddle, just, in my opinion, a thousand time cuter/more awesome...)?

corn on the cob or off?

ice cream or italian ice?

I don't know anything about your questions being deleted. I didn't do it. I don't have those powers here, despite my awesome crew status.

Physical are more satisfying. That's the worst part of the internet. Stupid people with internet balls.

Face. Nobody's ever seen Jack, because he's creepily secretive about his identity, so it's entirely possible he's not even a dude. It's also been postulated that he's an old guy pretending to be like 24 or whatever, but again, he's as secretive as a Palestinian dating a Jewish chick.

It's my sister's dog, and it was free because some other people didn't want it, so it's not like I picked it out. That being said, it's not totally awful.

On the cob, but those fuckers getting in between my teeth are annoying.

Ice cream. If I wanted water ice I'll just crush up some freaking ice cubes throw some sugar on it and a drop of food coloring. Beside, I don't like those gay paper cones they come in. Flimsy pieces of garbage.

Quote:

Originally posted by CatBack

Sorry, I 'ed in your .

Quote:

Originally posted by tequila64

what is the most embarrassing moment in your life ever ???

That would probably be the time ma dukes caught me jerking off when I was like 15 or something.

Moms: "Uh, what are you doing"
Me <w/ cock in my hand & a porno on the TV>: "Uh.....nooooooothiiinnng."

Quote:

Originally posted by cooper.

...
How long will this take?

Longer than I thought. While doing some computer maneuvers one of my hard drives took a big steamy shit, which took a day to clear up. Well, it didn't take a day, but I was preoccupied with other stuff too, so I didn't get a chance to get in here.

But the tortellini were delectable.

Quote:

Originally posted by cooper.

Where the fuck is Lindros?

I have unanswered questions, why?

I answered that in another post.

I'm not sure, but I'd like to remind you that curiosity killed the cat.

Quote:

Originally posted by Xandar

dont you know who unlikely hero is?

Yes, yes I do.

Quote:

Originally posted by RumDum

Why is that everytime I eat crab legs, the next day I get serouse butt mud..

Because you have the digestive system of a thirteen year old girl with palsy. Except you can't spell that well.

Quote:

Originally posted by cooper.

Do you think yourself and UnlikelyHero will ever see eye to eye?

Unlikely.

Quote:

Originally posted by Honda_X

...

I dunno, have any supermodels been kidnapped lately?

Haven't you heard, Megan Fox is single now. Brian Austin Green got dumped because he's old and is only famous for being the peripheral dude on 90210 who didn't shoot himself in the face with a shotgun.

What's it like to be eye fucked by a kumquot with shit expelling from yourself?

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

...

That would probably be the time ma dukes caught me jerking off when I was like 15 or something.

Moms: "Uh, what are you doing"
Me <w/ cock in my hand & a porno on the TV>: "Uh.....nooooooothiiinnng."

Lulz@ traumatizing moment.

Okay, which tagline do you prefer, The Best Amateur Porn Community, or Entertainment For men?

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

...

Haven't you heard, Megan Fox is single now. Brian Austin Green got dumped because he's old and is only famous for being the peripheral dude on 90210 who didn't shoot himself in the face with a shotgun.

Good, I was hoping he was one of those semi-famous only good until she got her career launched boyfriends. Hes an old fucking loser douche bag...who was fucking some pretty choice ass.....which just isn't fair in my books.

he's getting hot step out of his way

well he is fucking cold again all that thinking makes his head hurt

Quote:

Originally posted by tequila64

well he is fucking cold again all that thinking makes his head hurt

I'm going to take a nap. I figure I'll give you a day or two to read through all that.

Also, by about 5:30 tomorrow afternoon I have to memorize 30 paintings and their artists, so I have to do that between now and tomorrow.

O yeah, 5 stars

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

Nope. I had a police horse head butt my face though. That hurt like a motherfucker, because the metal bit in his mouth caught the corner of my eye. Stupid horse.

I'll vouch for that. For the longest time I thought I was the only one dumb enough to get head butted by a horse.
Me and you, we got a connection now.
...
...
Except I hate the Flyers
...
...
But considering some of the moves my team made I'm going to keep my mouth shut.

...

Oh yeah, questions!
What are you enrolled in at school and what school is it?

Would you rather the R8 or the new RS6?

Quote:

Originally posted by CatBack

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I'll vouch for that. For the longest time I thought I was the only one dumb enough to get head butted by a horse.
Me and you, we got a connection now.
...
...
Except I hate the Flyers
...
...
But considering some of the moves my team made I'm going to keep my mouth shut.

...

Oh yeah, questions!
What are you enrolled in at school and what school is it?

Would you rather the R8 or the new RS6?

My current (summer) classes are PO311-International Politics & FA335-Art History of the US. First one is a requisite of my minor, second one is just a necessary "fine arts" class. It's a small school in Eastern PA, but it has a pretty cool accelerated program that has 8-week evening courses, which lets me plow through a bunch of stuff I should have completed years ago.

Depends. It it were my only car I'd probably go for the RS6, just because I like the undercover-car-with-big-balls style, but if I already had a daily driver and was getting one as my second car I'd get the R8, instantly.

Do you think Jack will come back and moan about this thread again?

Quote:

Originally posted by TickLes

Do you think Jack will come back and moan about this thread again?

No, he has moved on with his life, and is much too mature and cool to care about anything people on a porn site say about him.





....oh, wait.

not funny