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The dick bone's connected to the ... what, the dick bone?
Where'd mine go?

Human males lack of baculum, but most other mammals have one.
Us humans guys just a cool hydraulic system built in, but damn, wouldn't a real "BONER" be cool as hell?

http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/discoblog/2011/08/19/ncbi-rofl-what-did-god-do-with-adams-penis-bone/

The man knows how to spend some cash!!

Would somebody tell U.S. politicians you can NOT spend more of what you ain't fuckin' got?

Seriously, if I'm in debt to MasterCard for $1,000, and I borrow $1,000 from a bank, or loan company ... I didn't get myself out of debt ... I just owe somebody else that money, probably at a more fucked up interest rate, so I'm actually MORE in debt now.

So anyway, Barack Obama has added as much to the national debt in a little over 900 days as "W" did in a little more than 2,000 days. And Obama is still going, and wanting to spend more money.

I think...cut some damn useless-ass programs, ditch some of the wasterful beaurocracies, and cute spending wherever you can (but leave our military alone....the cover our asses when we can't cover it ourselves).

Seriously....here's a scary number: the national debt is growing about $3 million a minute, even during one of his many vacations.

Read more of the details here: http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2011/08/obama-national-debt.html

Talk about a Blow Job....

MAN 'BLOWN UP' BY TUBE UP HIS ASS

The headline says it all. An electrician was almost killed during a work accident when a pressurised air hose accidentally went up his anus, and 'blew him up'.





Gareth Durrant was working on a ladder at the time, and was aware of the pressurised air hose behind him, which is used to operate tools and shoots air at 300lbs psi. Suddenly he felt a short explosion of air for a few seconds inside his rectum.

"I was reaching up to finish the wiring on a caravan at the factory. I knew this air hose was being used close behind me but I just carried on the job as normal.
"The next thing I knew I felt this strong air being blown on my legs from behind, and then something went up my rectum through the shorts I was wearing.
"It felt like I had been blown up, it was the biggest shock of my life. There was air fizzing around inside my back passage and stomach, it was so weird.
"At that time I didn't feel much pain, but the doctors later explained that was the adrenaline of the moment. Then it kicked in and I just can't put in to words how painful it was. I lay down, they rang for an ambulance and I was taken to hospital."

Gareth was taken in for emergency surgery to fix a six inch tear in his bowel and severe damage to his intestines. He still suffers from a bloated stomach now, almost a year later. He is also unable to work and support his young family and wife, who is 8 months pregnant. He is currently persuing a lawsuit against the company.


FULL STORY
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/8719851/Electrician-inflated-by-pressurised-air-which-shot-up-his-bottom-in-bizarre-factory-accident.html


Poor Guy!! I couldnt imagine anything worse than being blown up the arse!

The thing i don't actually get is how the hell did it get up his arse? Was it a prank from a colleague? Or did he think it'd be funny and now he's trying to cover his tracks?

Either way, its a painful one!

PAINTBALL GAME GOES WRONG AS SHOT TO CHEST EXPLODES BREAST IMPLANT!!!

The 26 year old woman who was playing paintball with some friends was shot in the chest during the action, she initially thought she had just suffered severe bruising but after the pain had not subsided after a few days she went to see her local doctor who revealed the force of the impact had actually ruptured one of her implants.

It's estimated the paintball was travelling at approx 190mph when it hit her and it is thought to be the first injury of it's kind associated with the popular pastime.

A spokesman for UK Paintball industry who run the Paintzone Paintball Park near Croydon, South London, where the accident happened said: "Part of the fun of paintball is that it hurts a bit when you get shot but in all the years we've been going we've never seen an incident like this.

Plastic surgeons reckon it could cost up to £3,000 to replace the damaged implant.

Full Story:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3772266/Paintball-shot-bursts-fake-boob.html


Kinda gives a whole new meaning to the term "take one for the team", I know as a guy getting hit in the nuts is agony so I can imagine that this is probably just as bad

FAMILY OF FIVE FOUND LIVING IN A CADILLAC.......

Police in Mt Dora, Florida discovered the weird find in the parking lot of a local Wal-Mart. The parents, Justin Hamilton 31 and Kristin Harris 26 told officers they had been living there with their 3 children for 3 days.

One of the children, a girl of seven was found to have horrific sunburn from the ordeal, the vehicle was littered with containers of spoiled milk and days old chicken bones amongst the filth.

Hamilton told local authorities that it was all a misunderstanding and that following recent eviction from his apartment and trouble with relatives they had been forced to spend the night in their car.

Police also found illegal prescription drug clonazepam in the vehicle

Both parents have been charged with child neglect and possession of an illegal prescription drug.

Full Story:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3770965/Family-of-five-live-in-a-Cadillac.html

What can i say ? well it could have been worse I suppose, could have been a compact and they might have had a dog with them too ..........makes you wonder though, if the guy was in the drivers seat and fancied a drink, would he have to switch to the passenger seat so he wouldn't get a DUI ?

I swear thie ain't bullshit!!

CONTAINERS OF BULL SEMEN WORTH $80,000 SPILL ONTO ROAD CAUSING A STINK (literally!!!)

When four vats of premium bull sperm fell off a bus spilling their contents onto a highway in Nashville, Tennessee, local police had to close off the interstate for four hours while they called in the fire brigade to check out the unusual conainers and their strange smelling load.

The police were first alerted by several motorists at around 5am after they recieved reports of a weird smell wafting across the road in that area, once on the scene the off ramp was quickly closed while the canisters were checked out and the owner of the foul smelling ooze was searched for.

A nearby greyhound bus ticket led police to eventually learn they were on their way to a breeding facility in Loredo, Texas. once they were deemed safe they were put back on board the bus to continue their journey.

Full Story:
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/873334-bull-semen-worth-48-000-spills-onto-road-creates-stink


Now that's what you call a lot of love

Funeral home accused of losing woman's body

OK, this one strikes a little close to home for me ... my dad is a managing partner at a funeral home business (and no, I won't post a link to the website for his funeral home, because no cheap publicity for me!!!... you want air time, you gotta buy it!)
ANYWAY ... it strikes close to home also because ...
HOW DO YOU LOSE A FUCKING HUMAN BODY?
I've been an editor of a newspaper, a sports editor of a newspaper, a general reporter, a photojournalist, a cop, hell, I've even been a cart pusher at fucking WalMart ... HOW DO YOU LOSE A FUCKING HUMAN BODY?

I would add some commentary, or some insight, or a journalistic interpretation of this story....but I can't. The headline says it all.
SO...sorry to be this way, but read it for yourself...then just ask yourself ... HOW DO YOU LOSE A FUCKING HUMAN BODY?

http://news.yahoo.com/funeral-home-accused-losing-womans-body-155414085.html

Quote:

Originally posted by Neonzero

FAMILY OF FIVE FOUND LIVING IN A CADILLAC.......

Police in Mt Dora, Florida discovered the weird find in the parking lot of a local Wal-Mart. The parents, Justin Hamilton 31 and Kristin Harris 26 told officers they had been living there with their 3 children for 3 days.

One of the children, a girl of seven was found to have horrific sunburn from the ordeal, the vehicle was littered with containers of spoiled milk and days old chicken bones amongst the filth.

Hamilton told local authorities that it was all a misunderstanding and that following recent eviction from his apartment and trouble with relatives they had been forced to spend the night in their car.

Police also found illegal prescription drug clonazepam in the vehicle

Both parents have been charged with child neglect and possession of an illegal prescription drug.

Full Story:
[ Link ]

What can i say ? well it could have been worse I suppose, could have been a compact and they might have had a dog with them too ..........makes you wonder though, if the guy was in the drivers seat and fancied a drink, would he have to switch to the passenger seat so he wouldn't get a DUI ?

SEE what I mean? FLORIDA!!!

And they had to do a study to figure this out?

"A female academic, Catherine Hakim, has ruffled feathers by saying women should use their 'erotic capital’ to get ahead."
What is erotic capital? A mixture of beauty, sex appeal, social skills and sexuality.
A lot of women have been doing this for years, and this chick had to do a study to figure it out? Where's she been?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/8717980/Just-show-me-the-money-honey.html

Tests show Amy Winehouse had no illegal drugs in body when she died.
**coughbullcoughshit**
OK, that could be true. Did they check for "technically legal" drugs that may have been in her system in massive amounts?

They did find alcohol in her system ... there's a big surprise!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/music/music-news/8718286/Amy-Winehouse-had-no-illegal-drugs-in-body-when-she-died-tests-show.html

Having played in a band in the 80s, and having played a lot of 80s hair/glam metal, I was obviously a little hurt when Jani Lane died recently.

I'm just going to post the headline here, and let those interested read it. I's a little too involved to do an appropriate summary, but the headlines tells tons....

Tragedy of Lane 911 call
Hotel staff refused to check whether Jani was still alive – but emergency operator wasn’t interested unless he was dead
Hotel staff who found Jani Lane’s body refused to check to see if he was still alive, a recording of an emergency call has revealed.


http://rocknewsdesk.com/world-news/tragedy-of-lane-911-call/3243/

So, we decided quite awesomely to end this contest a little bit early. Not much mind you.

We figured it would be better for the new news mods to actually start posting news rather than posting it here.

So, Sugarpie, Lindros and myself chose Rage4Order and Paddy!...A SHOCKING EXPLOSION OF AWESOMENESS!

Picking two, when we said we would only pick one? What wacky hijinks will we get up to next?!

We really appreciate all the people that came out and tried...you all did great.

We've picked two awesome chaps, in different time zones to post awesome news....so, it should be updated extremely frequently.

Guess it's time to make them bros mods, and LOCK IT UP.