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I Think My House Is Haunted.

Starter: John_T5 Posted: 13 years ago Views: 2.0K
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#4648881
Lvl 6
I have a pretty weird situation here fellows.


My place on the left.


You don't have to believe me, but I would rather you read through here with an open mind, and stay spiritually available.

My wife and I moved into a house about six months ago. We got a relatively good deal from a friend of mine who is a real estate agent. My friend "Mark" is a really nice guy. He really is more of a friend of my wife, but he's still a great guy. Or maybe not, for leaving out the part about GHOSTS IN MY HOUSE!

I work extremely strange hours and my job forces me to leave for large amounts of time on end. At first, when my wife suggested strange goings on. I was finding a lot of my things moved in my office. Mostly banking documents and such. When I approached my wife with it she really had no idea, and suggested maybe the wind had blown them around, and dog eared them. Really.

So, a few weeks later I came on and I heard what sounded like a scream from up stairs. I ran up to find Mark out of breath in the guest room. It looked like he had been in a fight mind you, he was sweated and winded. Mark told me my wife Nicole had called him after she heard some strange noises in the house. I asked if she was referring to the scream I heard and she nodded. Both Nicole and Mark look confused and distraught. The guest room was a mess, the bathroom was a mess, my office again, was a mess..as was the master bedroom.

I contacted a local clergyman to come in, and he said he sensed something was weird. He tried to persuade me away from the Supernatural, and more towards the practical, such as an attempted robbery or something, as the house had sat vacant for quite some time. I informed him I frequently watch Celebrity Ghost Stories and that I knew what I was talking about. It really should be called "Celebrity" Ghost Stories though, as most of the celebrities are C-list at best.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Celebrity_Ghost_Stories

So, with no help from the holy man I turned to the internet. I was told to get holy water, salt and iron. I keep them in my office. This has become a massive strain on my relationship with my wife Nicole, as the spirit seems to be focused on two things specifically, one is my office documents, and two is my wife.

I often find her with bruises and scratches on her neck and body, I often arrive home in the night and find her unable to sleep, just laying in bed as if she had ran a marathon, covered in sweat.

As time progressed, it got worse. I asked Mike to stay over more often, as it made my wife feel safer to have a man in the house, and he, even though jokingly at first, suggested Aliens. Which is another legitimate possibility. As far little actually takes place when I'm there, I have to believe that whatever is doing this is focused mostly on my wife, and not I. I like to stay extremely open minded about things (as I hope you will also) but I'm just at a loss and I don't know how to fix it. Things just seem to get worse. Mike often shows up as I'm leaving on business, and I often come home to some sort of paranormal goings on. Screams, banging noises...running, whispers.

This is kinda personal and I wasn't planning on getting into it, but the whole experience has really hurt the libido of my wife. Where as we used to have sex once or twice every two weeks, we were not having any relations at all for a good while there, which is strange as I'm 32 and she's only 21. She says she's often tired from work, but as she works from home, I thought it was the spirit that had her down.

Then, something happened, that when explained to the clergyman I had spoken to, really threw him for a loop. I came home one night around 2am...I walked in quietly after being dropped off by a cab, and I could hear more screaming from upstairs. I ran up and found my wife was tied to the headboard using sheets, and was gagged and blindfolded with her feet bound apart. I ran over and untied her, and she had this, almost demonic look on her face...as if she had been possessed. She look extremely puzzled to see me and immediately came to her senses. That was when she confessed she had in fact, been raped.

I threw open the door to the guest room where Mike was sleeping and told him what had happened. A ghost raped my wife, he gasped in shock, almost comically. But people do weird things in weird situations. I think he was mostly disoriented from a nightmare he was having. Mike also sleeps in the nude, which made things awkward for us, and a little intimidating for me, as Mike has a rather large penis, and I'm glad I was the one that opened the door and not my wife, I would hate to think she might have lusty thoughts for our good friend Mike. Nicole would never do that though, as she barely even sleeps with me anymore, plus I trust her completely. It was love at first sight.

A little fun back story. I made a lot of money in my late 20's through some wise business practices, so I bought my baby, an early 2000s Ferrari 360. My wife came over to admire it one day while I was parked, and we got to talking and it turned out she really liked me, and we hit it off instantly. So, I know even though all of us stray a little occasionally, she loves me heart and soul.

So, now here we are months later, my wife is now pregnant, due to the ghost rape....I know this as we have not made love in months. I'm not sure how to proceed, as the house was only built in 1999 and there have never been any strange occurrences here. After repeated attempts to get it exercised? I've been told to let it go, and look for a more practical explanation.

I'm at a loss, thoughts?
#4648882
Lvl 59
It was probably built on an indian burial ground or something.

Since, you know, it's new but obviously haunted by demons.
#4648883
Lvl 28
Quote:
Originally posted by EricLindros

It was probably built on an indian burial ground or something.

Since, you know, it's new but obviously haunted by demons.


Sounds legit.

I do believe in the Aliens theory myself...I recently seen an episode of the X-Files where Scully gets abducted.

So uhh..that happens apparently.
#4648884
Lvl 59
Or, wait, HEY JOHN!

Did you ever consider that it might be you!

Like, you might actually be Mike!

Like, do you have hazy dreams about things involving fucking your wife?

Did you ever go to her hotel room because she was worried her tit was going to rot off? And did she have a rubbery dildo on her dresser?

What I'm getting at here is YOUR NAME IS PROBABLY ROBERT PAULSON!
#4648885
Lvl 26
I have a theory.

#4648886
Lvl 28
Ancient Aliens.
#4648887
Lvl 22
Too ripped to read all that so I'll try again tomorrow.
#4648888
Lvl 28
Stop doing drugs bro.
#4648889
Lvl 22
They are the prescribed ones.
#4648890
Lvl 19
I'm confused. Are Mark and Mike the same person?
#4648891
Lvl 28
Quote:
Originally posted by BillK

I'm confused. Are Mark and Mike the same person?


Good question. Seems like a massive continuity error.

I have to believe it's Mark Walhbergs fault.
#4648892
Lvl 59
Quote:
Originally posted by BillK

I'm confused. Are Mark and Mike the same person?


#4648893
Lvl 28
The Tyler Durden theory pics up steam.
#4648894
Lvl 13
Sounds like you have a big problem, I'd like to see a picture of what the ghost baby looks like when it's born.
#4648895
Lvl 59
Probably Ed Norton.

#4648896
Lvl 14
that or your wife is screwing your friend, either way.....
#4648897
Lvl 29
Sounds to me like it's Mike/Mark banging his wife and blaming it on the ghosts




........just sayin'
#4648898
Lvl 29
I'm kickin' my ass!
#4648899
Lvl 28
Quote:
Originally posted by the_kevin1

Sounds to me like it's Mike/Mark banging his wife and blaming it on the ghosts


#4648900
Lvl 59
OMG this is perfect for this thread:

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