How to Get and Keep a Hot Girlfriend. (Suggestions)

Funny stuff

1. Keep all your receipts, it makes you look like a successful business man...women love dudes with money.

2. Never make noise during sex..it makes you look weak, the only noise you should hear is the girls pelvis breaking. Girls love that.

3. If she watches any show you don't like, make sure to change it to porno, and or lock your satellite/cable boxes. Girls love porno, and she shouldn't have left the kitchen in the first place.

4. Shower inanimate objects with extreme affection, but always seem mildly pissed off and annoyed with your date...for instance, kiss your car softly and tell it you love it. Girls love being jealous of shit that isn't even alive, and when you break up under hilarious circumstances...she'll know not to wreck your car, becuase you love it so much.

5. If you suspect shes cheating on you, follow her around..and wait until she talks to any dude. Proceed to bootfuck said guy until he's unrecognizable..girls love a guy who is willing to fight for their attention.

Quote:

Originally posted by Honda_X

1. Keep all your receipts, it makes you look like a successful business man...women love dudes with money.

2. Never make noise during sex..it makes you look weak, the only noise you should hear is the girls pelvis breaking. Girls love that.

3. If she watches any show you don't like, make sure to change it to porno, and or lock your satellite/cable boxes. Girls love porno, and she shouldn't have left the kitchen in the first place.

4. Shower inanimate objects with extreme affection, but always seem mildly pissed off and annoyed with your date...for instance, kiss your car softly and tell it you love it. Girls love being jealous of shit that isn't even alive, and when you break up under hilarious circumstances...she'll know not to wreck your car, becuase you love it so much.

5. If you suspect shes cheating on you, follow her around..and wait until she talks to any dude. Proceed to bootfuck said guy until he's unrecognizable..girls love a guy who is willing to fight for their attention.

The hell you say

Quote:

Originally posted by WindyM

...The hell you say

...Hell say the you

Lol those are some good tips, I cant wait for the lawsuits when someone tries them

Haha

Quote:

Originally posted by Honda_X

3. If she watches any show you don't like, make sure to change it to porno, and or lock your satellite/cable boxes. Girls love porno, and she shouldn't have left the kitchen in the first place.

Shouldn't have left the kitchen in the first place

Quote:

Originally posted by EricLindros

II. Get her name tattooed on your forehead. I mean really, is there a better sign of commitment? I submit there is not.

Man, someone almost went through with it.

In fact, they took my idea, and added their own special twist!

Quote:

Originally posted by Latino

simple..

get some nicotine patches, the strong ones..
invite her to stay the night, stick a patch on her back..

the next day, if you plan on staying the whole day with her, make sure to wake up before her..
and replace the patch with a fresh one..

then, by the end of the day...giver her an embrace and remove it..

now...while shes away from you, shell have cravings for something...but not know what, and be in a shitty mood and feel like crap, then when you see her again, embrace and attach a patch. Shell feel better again.....and when you part, again embrace etc..

after a few days, shell realise that the only thing in life that makes her feel good is you..

game over.

men 1 : women 0

Hahaha thats the best idea ive ever heard!! Fucking genius!!!

If you try it, make sure you have protection. Like a sword.

Epic frontbutt is epic.

no real work required. just be me!

Step 1: Place order online

Step 2: Receive package, place lips on nipple and blow.

Step 3: Take her with you everywhere you go. Sooner or later another girl will become jealous of your sexy lady friend and attempt to imitate her. This is the girl you want as she clearly knows her place in society.

Step 4: Follow the guidance from Honda's original 3 pics and she's yours forever. Congratulations, you can now also fulfill your dream of having a threesome at the same time.



<--- 2 living bananas and a blow up banana

no idea