Due to unfortunate circumstances in my life recently, I've found myself watching a show called "16 and Pregnant"..some of you may have heard of it, others will be furrowing their brows in confusion wondering what this show could possibly be about.
Dumb ass teenagers getting pregnant. I was going to say "preggers" but whenever anyone says "preggers" in real life, I kinda wanna push them off a building, whilst pretending I'm John McClane in the first Die Hard...the one with that guy who plays "Snape" in Harry Potter...I think his name is Alan Rickman, either way, it's a fucking sweet movie you should watch more often.
Where was I?
Dumb chicks who get pregnant...
I DO NOT FIND TEEN PREGNANCY FUNNY.
A lot of you....with vaginas will be all "teen pregnancy is a serious problem, be more serious, and cut your hair....rebel."
I agree with you, teen pregnancy isn't funny, unless it happens to someone you know that totally deserves it for being a jackass. Looking at you..people who practice the rhythm method.
Okay, for those of your who have seen this show, and lol'd at it...you're already in the know, so most of this is directed at people who are all "MTV?!...*rage eyebrows*" I know where you're coming from, MTV is quite possibly the worst channel ever, considering it plays maybe four minutes of music per week. But, what they have decided to do, rather than playing awful music a lot, is exploit stupid teenagers.
The concept isn't funny. I didn't think "oh, pregnant teens...that's gonna be HI-larious" but, in watching it I've come to realize it's about the funniest god damn show on television. I'll give you some example of the majority of episodes.
"It wont change my life..."
This phrase is spoken almost every episode, after the teen talks about how average she is, and like everyone else she is, and then is all "lol, but im pregnant..."
These kids honestly, genuinely think having a fucking child will be like owning a kitten. They talk about college, they talk about prom..and their social life, and how everything will remain the same, which actually sets it up to be MUCH funnier in end of the episode..but more on that later. Funfact: The girls ususally have this cocky little smile on their face, like they know more about life than..their parents/grand parents/friends/teachers....the world.
My boyfriend and I love each other
Oh man, yeah, if there's one thing teenage boys are excellent at, it's responsibility, they're all about sideways hats and providing for families.
The men on this show are fucking awful. I mean..you have to be either stupid, or a scumbag to knock up a 16 year old chick, and honestly, they are for the most part, the worst example of men ever. Almost every single episode ends with the couple breaking up, mainly becuase they're little kids making a MASSIVE life decision. It's always so awesome, in one of the most recent episodes I watched, the dude was cheating on her..while she was in labor...WHAT?! I know right, I had to wipe the tears from my eyes it was so hilarious. Man, the guys almost always cheat...it almost never works out, it's the bestest.
Will giving birth hurt?
These girls have no idea what they're in store for, it's cute...it's like, a rare innocence you don't see in most circumstances anymore. Because giving birth is so hyped up to hurt, when their friends and mothers are telling them how bad it is, you can kinda tell they're only half listening, "yeah yeah..pregnancy hurts..*text message*" while rolling their eyes. So, when the pregnancy comes, they're fucking overwhelmed by the intense pain. It's fucking hysterical watching life just dick slapping the shit out of someone whose biggest concern in life should have been staying fit and pretty...since that's what all girls strive to achieve.
Sidenote: Babies are fucking gross when they're born. What the fuck...the dads kiss them and the moms hold them, they look like a pug dipped in ooze. It's fucking gross. Plus they're all purple and shit...yuck.
I can do it without him! / My parents!
In some cases, it's the boyfriend, in other cases, it's the parents.....but in 90% of cases, it's hilarious.
Babies are extremely fucking expensive apparently. Also, time consuming, as most of us past 20 have realized, once you have a kid, shit is fucking over...that's all your time. So these girls, who probably recently watch some BS chick comedy where the main character probably fucking Jennifer Lopez/Aniston where they think they can do this by themselves after their boyfriend leaves, or their parents go back to work. Step one is always drop out of school, the majority don't even try to act like they're going to go back. They spend weeks/months trying to raise a baby on their own, but unfortunately Twilight doesn't teach you anything worth knowing about raising children, it does teach you a lot about how unfair the world is, where people who write stupid bullshit are rich, and my stupid bullshit goes unpaid. Anyway...
I fucked up I don't regret it, but it has been hard.
Most teen moms realize that their kids might see this one day, so they don't want to flat out say "I fucked up so bad, and I regret it with every fiber of my being"..so they just kinda look into the camera with the sad eyes of a defeated person (see: Britney Spears after 2007...no really..look into her eyes, the sadness is indescribable)...and they go on about how hard it is, and how they miss being regular teenagers, they miss friends, and school and you know, enjoying life...now that they've gone basically from being a student directly into being a fucking business time adult...missing out on college, and a lot of what comes with growing up, most notably, maturing. They're kids raising kids..they're a demographic, and now..in some cases I'm sure it works out, but in most cases, I'm sure it's a struggle...but in all cases, it's fucking hilarious to watch.
Note: They have a show after each season, it's called "Teen Mom" and it follows a select few longer than the "16 and Pregnant" does..it's kinda less funny, and more sad..since the show is mostly funny in the same sense that laughing at your friend who drunkenly fell into the fire while trying to jump over it is funny. Jackasses who ask for trouble, then find it...are hilarious. Everyone said "don't" but some people have to learn the hard way, and that shit is hilarious. In Teen Mom you kinda get into their lives and just feel bad for them overall since you get to know them a little, which is a bummer, plus you're more aware that these teens will probably end up getting paid a solid amount of money for being in an actual TV show, which makes it even less funny.
Anyway, if you haven't given this show a brief watch, you should give it a chance, it's usually a solid comedy.
Dumb ass teenagers getting pregnant. I was going to say "preggers" but whenever anyone says "preggers" in real life, I kinda wanna push them off a building, whilst pretending I'm John McClane in the first Die Hard...the one with that guy who plays "Snape" in Harry Potter...I think his name is Alan Rickman, either way, it's a fucking sweet movie you should watch more often.
Where was I?
Dumb chicks who get pregnant...
I DO NOT FIND TEEN PREGNANCY FUNNY.
A lot of you....
I agree with you, teen pregnancy isn't funny, unless it happens to someone you know that totally deserves it for being a jackass. Looking at you..people who practice the rhythm method.
Okay, for those of your who have seen this show, and lol'd at it...you're already in the know, so most of this is directed at people who are all "MTV?!...*rage eyebrows*" I know where you're coming from, MTV is quite possibly the worst channel ever, considering it plays maybe four minutes of music per week. But, what they have decided to do, rather than playing awful music a lot, is exploit stupid teenagers.
The concept isn't funny. I didn't think "oh, pregnant teens...that's gonna be HI-larious" but, in watching it I've come to realize it's about the funniest god damn show on television. I'll give you some example of the majority of episodes.
"It wont change my life..."
This phrase is spoken almost every episode, after the teen talks about how average she is, and like everyone else she is, and then is all "lol, but im pregnant..."
These kids honestly, genuinely think having a fucking child will be like owning a kitten. They talk about college, they talk about prom..and their social life, and how everything will remain the same, which actually sets it up to be MUCH funnier in end of the episode..but more on that later. Funfact: The girls ususally have this cocky little smile on their face, like they know more about life than..their parents/grand parents/friends/teachers....the world.
My boyfriend and I love each other
Oh man, yeah, if there's one thing teenage boys are excellent at, it's responsibility, they're all about sideways hats and providing for families.
The men on this show are fucking awful. I mean..you have to be either stupid, or a scumbag to knock up a 16 year old chick, and honestly, they are for the most part, the worst example of men ever. Almost every single episode ends with the couple breaking up, mainly becuase they're little kids making a MASSIVE life decision. It's always so awesome, in one of the most recent episodes I watched, the dude was cheating on her..while she was in labor...WHAT?! I know right, I had to wipe the tears from my eyes it was so hilarious. Man, the guys almost always cheat...it almost never works out, it's the bestest.
Will giving birth hurt?
These girls have no idea what they're in store for, it's cute...it's like, a rare innocence you don't see in most circumstances anymore. Because giving birth is so hyped up to hurt, when their friends and mothers are telling them how bad it is, you can kinda tell they're only half listening, "yeah yeah..pregnancy hurts..*text message*" while rolling their eyes. So, when the pregnancy comes, they're fucking overwhelmed by the intense pain. It's fucking hysterical watching life just dick slapping the shit out of someone whose biggest concern in life should have been staying fit and pretty...since that's what all girls strive to achieve.
Sidenote: Babies are fucking gross when they're born. What the fuck...the dads kiss them and the moms hold them, they look like a pug dipped in ooze. It's fucking gross. Plus they're all purple and shit...yuck.
I can do it without him! / My parents!
In some cases, it's the boyfriend, in other cases, it's the parents.....but in 90% of cases, it's hilarious.
Babies are extremely fucking expensive apparently. Also, time consuming, as most of us past 20 have realized, once you have a kid, shit is fucking over...that's all your time. So these girls, who probably recently watch some BS chick comedy where the main character probably fucking Jennifer Lopez/Aniston where they think they can do this by themselves after their boyfriend leaves, or their parents go back to work. Step one is always drop out of school, the majority don't even try to act like they're going to go back. They spend weeks/months trying to raise a baby on their own, but unfortunately Twilight doesn't teach you anything worth knowing about raising children, it does teach you a lot about how unfair the world is, where people who write stupid bullshit are rich, and my stupid bullshit goes unpaid. Anyway...
Most teen moms realize that their kids might see this one day, so they don't want to flat out say "I fucked up so bad, and I regret it with every fiber of my being"..so they just kinda look into the camera with the sad eyes of a defeated person (see: Britney Spears after 2007...no really..look into her eyes, the sadness is indescribable)...and they go on about how hard it is, and how they miss being regular teenagers, they miss friends, and school and you know, enjoying life...now that they've gone basically from being a student directly into being a fucking business time adult...missing out on college, and a lot of what comes with growing up, most notably, maturing. They're kids raising kids..they're a demographic, and now..in some cases I'm sure it works out, but in most cases, I'm sure it's a struggle...but in all cases, it's fucking hilarious to watch.
Note: They have a show after each season, it's called "Teen Mom" and it follows a select few longer than the "16 and Pregnant" does..it's kinda less funny, and more sad..since the show is mostly funny in the same sense that laughing at your friend who drunkenly fell into the fire while trying to jump over it is funny. Jackasses who ask for trouble, then find it...are hilarious. Everyone said "don't" but some people have to learn the hard way, and that shit is hilarious. In Teen Mom you kinda get into their lives and just feel bad for them overall since you get to know them a little, which is a bummer, plus you're more aware that these teens will probably end up getting paid a solid amount of money for being in an actual TV show, which makes it even less funny.
Anyway, if you haven't given this show a brief watch, you should give it a chance, it's usually a solid comedy.