Strip Clubs In Canada.

Hello, friends.

I've come to talk to you about a pretty serious issue. My friend has asked me to come with him to a fine, upstanding titty bar establishment, featuring breasts.



I was like "nah"...then I figured meh, what the fuck...I'm sure it'll be sleazy and gross, but maybe someone will beat the shit out of me, and that would be a funny story.

So, the problem I'm having is one, I hate asking people anything IRL...which is why I'm here, and two, in Canada our lowest currency bill is a $5. Now, I would love to put poor young girls through medical/law/clown school, one dollar at a time, but motha fucka....I'm not making it rain with five dollar bills.



Like, five dollar bills?..Here are my questions for those of you who want to use "common sense" and those of you who frequent breasty lounges.



If I hit up a change machine, can I throw quarters at a stripper?

If I can't throw quarters..can I throw one dollar coins?

Can I cut a five dollar bill into five individual pieces, or pull a "pokemon"..gotta collect em all atmosphere?





Okay, so..I've always been of the opinion that if I'm going to pay chicks to get naked, I might as well get some hookers.

So, any tips or tricks for strip clubs? Anything I should know? Should I try cocaine for the first time...because that sounds like a terrible idea?



Hit me with your tales of interest, bros. (and possibly SP)

When you throw your bills in the air it's called making it rain.

When you throw thirty dollars in coins in the air it's called making it hail. (some establishments frown on this) (most)

Cocaine is bad no matter how or why you do it. Bad road to go down.

Take a girl with you to the strip club. Best night ever. The strippers love it.

So what?..Rock fives?

Fuck that sir.

Also, I don't want to bring a girl, because girls are fucking evil.

it is true though...strippers love it when you take a girl with you, its like they enjoy trying to piss of your girl, since they assume its a gf or date
and do you HAVE to give them money?? I dont know if its ettiquette over there, or if its a rule or something.....here, most strip clubs only kick you out when you stop drinking....they dont care if you give the girls money or not, as long as youre buying alcohol. Plus, the girls get money from the private sessions, grinds etc.......well, around here anyways.....from what ive been told

Some useful information. Good for strip clubs and life in general.

Yeah, I can't help you here, brah.

I've never gone to a strip club in a country that doesn't use $1 bills. I'd be pretty reluctant to start tossing five-spots at these broads while they shake their tittays at me. Seems like that could get real expensive real quick.

Rule #1 always tip the bouncer at least 5$ when he takes you to your table (that makes sure he's happy and also he's gonna back your ass when the douchebag sitting at the next table starts making shit).

Rule #2 If you don't drink, then the nice waitress will ask you to get the hell out, right before the bouncer does.

Rule #3 A 5$ bill doesnt get you much... she's just gonna shake her ass at your table, go for the 20$ private dance in a booth... but then again watch out... Once your in the booth alone with the chick and the song starts... she's gonna start chatting with ya to make the time go by... and before you know it, you owe her 40$ cause the shit took 2 songs.
So never be afraid to tell her to shut the hell up and dance.

Rule #4 While she dances you can touch all you want, breasts and ass, but usualy the snatch is a no go... unless your me, I usualy got around to it back in the days. And the hotties didn't mind it

rule #5 NEVER HAVE SEX WITH THEM.

So if you wanna play it right, bring about 100$ for a reasonable evening.

That is all

Quote:

Originally posted by Latino

it is true though...strippers love it when you take a girl with you, its like they enjoy trying to piss of your girl, since they assume its a gf or date
and do you HAVE to give them money?? I dont know if its ettiquette over there, or if its a rule or something.....here, most strip clubs only kick you out when you stop drinking....they dont care if you give the girls money or not, as long as youre buying alcohol. Plus, the girls get money from the private sessions, grinds etc.......well, around here anyways.....from what ive been told

The strippers love it when you bring an attractive girl with you because they are so tired of dealing with smelly ugly dudes all day. They love you because you have brought them a soft lovely female they can touch and have fun with. I gets you alot of attention from the strippers as well so it makes everyones night that much better. (Of course the girl you take with you has to be into it.)

Quote:

Originally posted by Honda_X

So what?..Rock fives?

There is only one solution.

Dollar coins in paper airplanes. No thanks necessary brah.

I am by no means an expert on this subject, but I have been to a strip club before (maybe more than once) and what was happening there was, guys were throwing $1 and $2 dollar coins all the time. The strippers dancers make a game out of it. They lay spread eagle and place a coin on their lady bits and then encourage guys to to try and knock off that coin with another coin. If a guy does knock it off, then he usually wins a little poster of her or something like that.

It's kinda like going to the fair and throwing a baseball at the pins and knocking them down, only with less baseballs and pins and more vagina.

Quote:

Originally posted by Sugarpie

I am by no means an expert on this subject, but I have been to a strip club before (maybe more than once) and what was happening there was, guys were throwing $1 and $2 dollar coins all the time. The strippers dancers make a game out of it. They lay spread eagle and place a coin on their lady bits and then encourage guys to to try and knock off that coin with another coin. If a guy does knock it off, then he usually wins a little poster of her or something like that.

It's kinda like going to the fair and throwing a baseball at the pins and knocking them down, only with less baseballs and pins and more vagina.

That's actually kind of interesting to me. I'm sure if I started tossing dollar coins on the stage or at the dancer I would be shut down pretty quickly. The fact that it's acceptable there must be a result of not having any 1 dollar bills. Since people are normally not inclined to toss five dollar bills the dancers have to get their singles somehow.

Canada. It's almost like a whole different country.

I heard stories from when they first got rid of the dollar bills, guys started throwing coins because they didn't have anything else to throw, and strippers were yelling at them that they weren't slot machines. Funny times.

Quote:

Originally posted by hydrahead

Take a girl with you to the strip club. Best night ever. The strippers love it.

i took my 22yr niece once.. she's bi & had a better time then me save your money

Quote:

Originally posted by Sugarpie

It's kinda like going to the fair and throwing a baseball at the pins and knocking them down, only with less baseballs and pins and more vagina.

I think I would enjoy such a fair.

go to a bank and exchange your 5's for our 1's and see how they like that.

Quote:

Originally posted by hydrahead

When you throw your bills in the air it's called making it rain.

When you throw thirty dollars in coins in the air it's called making it hail. (some establishments frown on this) (most)

Cocaine is bad no matter how or why you do it. Bad road to go down.

Take a girl with you to the strip club. Best night ever. The strippers love it.

Actually if you take 100 girls with you that are really kinky the strippers hate it because they do not make any money. I'm going to just such a party tonight. The note came out that said "ladies can dance on the stage but please leave your bottoms on." OK not a direct quote but that was the jist. Ah... my life is fun! Girls are evil unless you have one like mine.

Man, this sounds like a lot of work.

Also, now I kinda don't wanna go because I don't drink.

------note this may sound gay-------

I do not want strippers to touch me, and I do not want to touch them.

So now I'm double worried. lol

I don't wanna touch strippers either.

Lets get to more pictures of Hapyhub's girl.

Awful advice brah.