relationship help needed..

alright here goes...

This girl i met in the summer of 2006 i really liked, so i just got ballsy and tried to kiss her one night. Everything went great and were together for 3 weeks when she told me she thought it was a mistake. She said it was because i was moving to fast and i had a way of being an ass to her ( which is tru i admit it, jealousy and stuff). Almost 8 months went by in which we didnt talk to each other at all, and she had a new boyfriend. She imed me out of the blue one night wanting to chill so i did. Soon after she broke up with her boyfriend and weve been hanging out for like 3 months ago. In this time hanging out again we havent hooked up once we just kinda been friend but my feelings for her have really been stirred up again and i can JUST TELL love i love her to death. My problem is what do yo uguys, and ladies, think if she want me back or no ? We hang out about 3 or 4 times a week, and when we do we just get coffe or ice cream or watever and talk. She always talks to me about how her ex keeps calling her and she cant stand him and blah blah and she smiles and hits me and does all these flirty things with me that make me belive shes interested again. But then again she told me she didnt want a boyfriend like 2 weeks ago. Im torn about what to do and the whole situation for me is really confusing cause i just KNOW that shes the one and i dunno what to do. What do you guys think ?

Ah, mixed signals... I hate when they do that.

Sounds like she likes to play games. Which sucks. I hated that shit. Based on your account, it does sound like she has an interest in you.

My advice is to just continue to hang out, and pretend like you don't have a romantic interest. Don't be a total ass, but don't kiss her ass either. My guess is that if she is really interested, she'll make a move at some point.

However, if you move first, she'll likely retract. Sounds weird, but that's the way it goes with chicks that like to play games.

That old story of "Play it cool, let them make the first move," really is true... You're already hanging out, so she likes being around you.

I worked with this gal when I was out of high school, totally hot, way out of my league. While all the other guys hit her up every night, I just went about my business. One night she walked by and wrapped her leg around mine and asked me how I was doing. I of course, was a total dork at that time, and blew it by sending her flowers, and calling her too much. In the end I found the babe for me, but I blew it back then, by "professing my love". Don't do it!

you know, she may know that you got it bad for her and she may be using this to her advantage? or perhaps not...

who know what advice to give since we all will tell you from personal experience.

i don't know, man... you went out for 3 wks, then she broke it off, and now you've been hanging out for 3mths or so and you're ready to profess your love for her...this may scare her away.

hmpf! unrequited love...

alright. i have a question: you say you see each other frequently. who inititates this? you or her? perhaps, be less forward on your approach. busy yourself with other things; miss a day or two of hanging out with her. i don't mean play games with her. but just subtle thngs to give you a much better idea if she's keen keen or just keen on you as a friend. the latter sucks, i know.

Just keep chillin with her, if she wants somethin more she'll let you know eventually. If you get all lovey dovey on her and thats not what she wants, you'll probably lose her as a friend too. Maybe get her drunk and still play it cool, if she wants you she might not be able to hold back. Its still better to have her as a friend than nothing at all. Keep on truckin'

Your her gay guy friend.

I've been there too. Move on. It isn't worth the aggravation.

Coming froma woman's point of view, it doesnt look like you and her will be more than friends. she seems to already have it set in her mind that is all you will be. i would say focus your time into another woman. the only exception is if she just ebcame single and is looking to go wild. then she might jhook up with you, but if she is not that type of eprson, then friends is all you will be.

Quote:

Originally posted by twwain

you know, she may know that you got it bad for her and she may be using this to her advantage? or perhaps not...

who know what advice to give since we all will tell you from personal experience.

i don't know, man... you went out for 3 wks, then she broke it off, and now you've been hanging out for 3mths or so and you're ready to profess your love for her...this may scare her away.

hmpf! unrequited love...

alright. i have a question: you say you see each other frequently. who inititates this? you or her? perhaps, be less forward on your approach. busy yourself with other things; miss a day or two of hanging out with her. i don't mean play games with her. but just subtle thngs to give you a much better idea if she's keen keen or just keen on you as a friend. the latter sucks, i know.

Its mutual, sometimes ill ask her to chill, sometimes she asks me. All of you posts have been very helpful, im just gonna do what i gotta do and if it works it works if not o well, just sucks cause i really got that feeling about her. ty guys n girls..

bunny boiler - run away as fast as you can

tell her u dont want a stedy girlfriend but being fuck buddys is cool with u

you gotta make it seem like your not interested...even though you are. Sometimes when she wants to hang out, be like ah i can't I'm hanging out w/ ___ (and make it another chick). She might get a lil jealous and move in on ya. if she wants you it'll work, if not it won't...

Quote:

Originally posted by biggiesin

alright here goes...
i had a way of being an ass to her ( which is tru i admit it, jealousy and stuff).

There you go. You have answered your question.
I'd move on if I was you.

forgot about her and fuck a new ex yr gf

She's a hustler. She knows you want her and seems to be just leading you on. Do you buy her coffee & ice cream when you go hang out? In other words, do you pay for everything? If so, she's hustlin' dude. I know a few girls who do that shit. If you're buyin', she's flyin', but without anything in return. The flirting she does just suckers you in so you don't move on. The one thing she doesn't want most is another hustlin' ass woman to steal her hustle, it's a game they love to play. Move on pimp, there's plenty of good girls out there who actually would deserve you. Stop wasting your time, feelings and you pocketbook.

Look for another girl, someone fresh, and cut down a little on the amount of time you spend with this first girl. Keep the first one 'under observation'. If she gets the idea you might be into another girl, you may just force her to show her hand, if she's really into you that is. If she's not, she'll just lose interest and you won't hear much from her.

Don't be afraid to lose this girl. It's a tough decision I know, but I've been there and you never know, there might be someone better just around the corner who won't mess you around.

i agree with the doing other things when she asks you to do something. Say you have a date or some shit ..and act all excited about it... even if you don't have one ... this will call her ass out in a heartbeat if she's interested in you romatically.

I think you should be able to judge her initial and ongoing reaction to it ...after you mention the date ..don't bring it up again ..EVER ..unless of course she does.

You must be prepared and must accept the truth ..if she has no romantic interest in you ... let it at that and move on. Then of course it would be a good idea to stop hanging out with her as well ... cant really move on with old shit right on top of your business all the time.

Quote:

Originally posted by *

Your her gay guy friend.

I was totally going to say that.

It's simple. Tell her that your not looking for another friend. That your interested in her for more than friendship and your not going to waste time on just another friendship and its up to her to make a choice. That assumes your willing to give up her friendship but its the easiest way to do it.

I really don't think you're going to get very far with this girl. She dropped you once. She came back because she wasn't happy with the boyfriend she had at the time and wanted a bit of companionship. I really don't mean to sound like a bitch, but you're basically her safety net. Her fall back plan. You desrve to be someone's choice, not consolation prize. Of course, this is just my opinion, but that's what you asked for.

Just ask her if she likes you? Or you could get close and try holding her hand .. good luck scotty