Witty jokes!

Post a short joke. It has to move the mind and the sixpack.

Here's mine:

"Hammer is a tool"

not sure i get it, maybe im the tool...

Forget it, bad idea. Please lock this shit.

Whack!!!

We are all bad joke tellers. You want the proof. Not a single good joke was posted in this thread.

They are all prisoners of our moderators. Refused to tell bad jokes, because the perfect atmosphere of our forum.

One even voted one star. Maybe this thread can win a contest for the worst thread, or maybe it will lose for the same reason! It is so fucking bad! I'm sorry. My bad.

Lmao

A priest, a rabbi, a minister, an Englishmanm, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman says "What is this, some kind of joke?"

Peter's sitting in a coffee shop, staring at a girl
wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen.

Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks,
"How do you get into those pants?"

The young lady looks him over and replies, "Well,
you could start by buying me dinner..."

Quote:

Originally posted by BrandonM

Forget it, bad idea. Please lock this shit.

no.


this is a funny thread.

Bob was pulling weeds in the back yard with his wife, when he looked over at her and said " you know, your ass sure has gotten big....I bet it's as big as the bar-be-que pit"...his wife kept working....later, he noticed her bent over again, so this time he went to find his measuring tape...he came back, measured her rump, went to the pit, and exclaimed loudly "I knew it!...your ass IS bigger than the pit!!"...his wife kept going without answering. Later that night, after they settled in for the night, Bob attemped to kindle a little romance, but his wife didn't even open her eyes. Bob nudged his aroused member closer to her bum, but again she didn't respond. Finally, Bob blurted out "What's the matter now?"....His wife calmly replied, "You think I'm Gonna fire up this big-ass grill for one little weiner?"

Quote:

Originally posted by sabre22b

A priest, a rabbi, a minister, an Englishmanm, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman says "What is this, some kind of joke?"

...you forgot the blonde, brunette and redhead group

My girlfriend just got a tattoo of a seashell on the inside of her thigh. If you put your ear to it, you can smell the ocean.

Q. A Blonde is on all fours...with cuim dripping down on both corners of her mouth.
What does this tell us??



A. The Floors even !!!

Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that
sometimes she's borderline irrational.

A. So what's your question?

Ok, so a dyslexic man walks into a bra...