Classic movie, great quotes, enjoy......
Airplane! Quotes
----------------
Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before.
Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?
----
Ted Striker: My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back?
Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified.
----
Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
----
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
-
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
-
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
----
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
----
Roger Murdock: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: L.A. departure frequency, 123 point 9'er.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Request vector, over.
Captain Oveur: What?
Tower voice: Flight 2-0-9'er cleared for vector 324.
Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.
Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?
Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!
Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Over.
Tower voice: Over.
Captain Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: Roger, over!
Roger Murdock: What?
Captain Oveur: Huh?
Victor Basta: Who?
----
Hanging Lady: Nervous?
Ted Striker: Yes.
Hanging Lady: First time?
Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times.
----
Dr. Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: I can't tell.
Dr. Rumack: You can tell me, I'm a doctor.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, I mean, I'm just not sure.
Dr. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Dr. Rumack: You can't take a guess "for another two hours"?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, no, no, I mean we can't land for another two hours.
-----
Operator: I have a emergency call for you on line five, from a Mr. Hamm.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Alright, give me Hamm on five, hold the mayo.
-----
Elaine Dickinson: You got a telegram from headquarters today.
Ted Striker: Headquarters--what is it?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, it's a big building where generals meet, but that's not important right now.
-----
Randy: There's been a little problem in the cockpit, and I was . . .
Ted Striker: The cockpit--what is it?
Randy: It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that's not important right now.
-----
Steve McCroskey: I want the best available man on this. A man who knows that plane inside and out. And, won't crack under pressure.
Johnny: How 'bout Mr. Rogers?
-----
Dr. Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice: steak or fish.
Dr. Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.
-----
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Joey, you like movies about gladiators?
-----
Dr. Rumack: Elaine, you're a member of this crew. Can you face some unpleasant facts?
Elaine Dickinson: No.
Airplane! II Quotes
-------------------
Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up 'till now.
Jacobs: Well, let's see: First the earth cooled. And, then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died, and they turned into oil. And, then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benzes. And, Prince Charles started wearing all of Lady Di's clothes. I couldn't believe it, he took her best summer dress out of the closet, and put it on, and went to town.
-----
Jimmy Wilson: Can I ask you a question?
Ted Striker: What is it?
Jimmy Wilson: It's an interrogative statement, used to test knowledge, but that's not important right now, mister.
-----
Ted Striker: They're launching the XR-2300! You know what that is doctor?
Dr. Stone: The muffler bracket for the '79 Pinto?
Ted Striker: No, that's the XR-2200. The 2300 is the lunar shuttle.
-----
Steve McCroskey: We keep losing their radio.
Bud Kruger: McCroskey, give it to me straight, what's it look like?
Steve McCroskey: A radio? Well, about so big, green, with numbers, lots of knobs.
-----
Witness: Striker was the squadron leader. He brought us in real low, but he couldn't handle it.
Prosecuting Attorney: Buddy couldn't handle it? Was Buddy one of your crew?
Witness: Right, Buddy was the bombardier, but it was Striker who couldn't handle it. And he went to pieces.
Prosecuting Attorney: Andy went to pieces?
Witness: No, Andy was the navigator, he was all right. Buddy went to pieces. It was awful how he came unglued.
Prosecuting Attorney: Howie came unglued?
Witness: Oh no, Howie was a rock, the best tail-gunner in the outfit. Buddy came unglued.
Prosecuting Attorney: And he bailed out?
Witness: No, Andy hung tough, Buddy bailed out! How we survived, was a miracle.
Prosecuting Attorney: Then Howie survived?
Witness: No, 'fraid not. We lost Howie the next day.
-----
Simon: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Gentlemen, welcome aboard.
Simon: Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and your first officer, Mr. Dunn.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Unger.
Mr. Unger: Oveur.
Mr. Dunn: Oveur.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Dunn. Gentlemen, let's get to work.
Simon: Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force?
Mr. Unger: Not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur, and I was under Dunn.
Mr. Dunn: Yep.
Simon: So, Dunn, you were under Oveur, and over Unger.
Mr. Dunn: Yep.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Uhh, that's right. Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.
Mr. Unger: So, you see, both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.
-----
Elaine Dickinson: Captain, I think we have a computer fowl-up.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: I see.
Elaine Dickinson: Well, what do you recommend, Captain?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Maybe you should run it through the computer.
Elaine Dickinson: But sir, I already have.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Good.
Elaine Dickinson: Just to be on the safe side, should I check the rear data-banks?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, why don't you check out the rear data-banks.
-----
Jimmy Wilson: Do you think that things will be a lot different on the moon, Dad?
John Wilson: Oh, it's gonna be terrific. Whole new world, new kids to play with.
Jimmy Wilson: Does that mean no more headlines about the rape trial?
John Wilson: How many kids get the chance to like on another planet?
Jimmy Wilson: No more kids shouting: "Your old man's a psychopathic sex pervert"?
-----
Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickinson?
Jacobs: Well, I'm two inches taller, a better dancer, and much more fun to be with.
-----
Ted Striker: Where am I gonna find a piece of metal, here, in space, at this hour?
-----
Prosecuting Attorney: Doctor, can you give the Court your impression of Mr. Striker?
Dr. Stone: I'm sorry, I don't do impressions, my training is in psychiatry.
-----
Mary: Captain, we've run out of coffee!
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Damn, if I told them once, I've told them one hundred times: "store extra coffee!"
-----
Buck Murdock: Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes.
-----
Steve McCroskey: I gotta say something about that guy up there, and I can sum it all up in just one word: courage, dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, metal, and G-U-T-S, guts! Why, Ted Striker has got more guts in his little finger than most of us have in out large intestine, including the colon!
Airplane! Quotes
----------------
Captain Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before?
Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before.
Captain Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked?
----
Ted Striker: My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar.
Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back?
Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified.
----
Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
----
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
-
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
-
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
----
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
----
Roger Murdock: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: L.A. departure frequency, 123 point 9'er.
Captain Oveur: Roger!
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Request vector, over.
Captain Oveur: What?
Tower voice: Flight 2-0-9'er cleared for vector 324.
Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.
Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?
Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!
Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur. Over.
Tower voice: Over.
Captain Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: Roger, over!
Roger Murdock: What?
Captain Oveur: Huh?
Victor Basta: Who?
----
Hanging Lady: Nervous?
Ted Striker: Yes.
Hanging Lady: First time?
Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times.
----
Dr. Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: I can't tell.
Dr. Rumack: You can tell me, I'm a doctor.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, I mean, I'm just not sure.
Dr. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Dr. Rumack: You can't take a guess "for another two hours"?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, no, no, I mean we can't land for another two hours.
-----
Operator: I have a emergency call for you on line five, from a Mr. Hamm.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Alright, give me Hamm on five, hold the mayo.
-----
Elaine Dickinson: You got a telegram from headquarters today.
Ted Striker: Headquarters--what is it?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, it's a big building where generals meet, but that's not important right now.
-----
Randy: There's been a little problem in the cockpit, and I was . . .
Ted Striker: The cockpit--what is it?
Randy: It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that's not important right now.
-----
Steve McCroskey: I want the best available man on this. A man who knows that plane inside and out. And, won't crack under pressure.
Johnny: How 'bout Mr. Rogers?
-----
Dr. Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice: steak or fish.
Dr. Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.
-----
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Joey, you like movies about gladiators?
-----
Dr. Rumack: Elaine, you're a member of this crew. Can you face some unpleasant facts?
Elaine Dickinson: No.
Airplane! II Quotes
-------------------
Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up 'till now.
Jacobs: Well, let's see: First the earth cooled. And, then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died, and they turned into oil. And, then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benzes. And, Prince Charles started wearing all of Lady Di's clothes. I couldn't believe it, he took her best summer dress out of the closet, and put it on, and went to town.
-----
Jimmy Wilson: Can I ask you a question?
Ted Striker: What is it?
Jimmy Wilson: It's an interrogative statement, used to test knowledge, but that's not important right now, mister.
-----
Ted Striker: They're launching the XR-2300! You know what that is doctor?
Dr. Stone: The muffler bracket for the '79 Pinto?
Ted Striker: No, that's the XR-2200. The 2300 is the lunar shuttle.
-----
Steve McCroskey: We keep losing their radio.
Bud Kruger: McCroskey, give it to me straight, what's it look like?
Steve McCroskey: A radio? Well, about so big, green, with numbers, lots of knobs.
-----
Witness: Striker was the squadron leader. He brought us in real low, but he couldn't handle it.
Prosecuting Attorney: Buddy couldn't handle it? Was Buddy one of your crew?
Witness: Right, Buddy was the bombardier, but it was Striker who couldn't handle it. And he went to pieces.
Prosecuting Attorney: Andy went to pieces?
Witness: No, Andy was the navigator, he was all right. Buddy went to pieces. It was awful how he came unglued.
Prosecuting Attorney: Howie came unglued?
Witness: Oh no, Howie was a rock, the best tail-gunner in the outfit. Buddy came unglued.
Prosecuting Attorney: And he bailed out?
Witness: No, Andy hung tough, Buddy bailed out! How we survived, was a miracle.
Prosecuting Attorney: Then Howie survived?
Witness: No, 'fraid not. We lost Howie the next day.
-----
Simon: Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain, Captain Oveur.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Gentlemen, welcome aboard.
Simon: Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and your first officer, Mr. Dunn.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Unger.
Mr. Unger: Oveur.
Mr. Dunn: Oveur.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Dunn. Gentlemen, let's get to work.
Simon: Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force?
Mr. Unger: Not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur, and I was under Dunn.
Mr. Dunn: Yep.
Simon: So, Dunn, you were under Oveur, and over Unger.
Mr. Dunn: Yep.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Uhh, that's right. Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.
Mr. Unger: So, you see, both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn.
-----
Elaine Dickinson: Captain, I think we have a computer fowl-up.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: I see.
Elaine Dickinson: Well, what do you recommend, Captain?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Maybe you should run it through the computer.
Elaine Dickinson: But sir, I already have.
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Good.
Elaine Dickinson: Just to be on the safe side, should I check the rear data-banks?
Capt. Clarence Oveur: No, why don't you check out the rear data-banks.
-----
Jimmy Wilson: Do you think that things will be a lot different on the moon, Dad?
John Wilson: Oh, it's gonna be terrific. Whole new world, new kids to play with.
Jimmy Wilson: Does that mean no more headlines about the rape trial?
John Wilson: How many kids get the chance to like on another planet?
Jimmy Wilson: No more kids shouting: "Your old man's a psychopathic sex pervert"?
-----
Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickinson?
Jacobs: Well, I'm two inches taller, a better dancer, and much more fun to be with.
-----
Ted Striker: Where am I gonna find a piece of metal, here, in space, at this hour?
-----
Prosecuting Attorney: Doctor, can you give the Court your impression of Mr. Striker?
Dr. Stone: I'm sorry, I don't do impressions, my training is in psychiatry.
-----
Mary: Captain, we've run out of coffee!
Capt. Clarence Oveur: Damn, if I told them once, I've told them one hundred times: "store extra coffee!"
-----
Buck Murdock: Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes.
-----
Steve McCroskey: I gotta say something about that guy up there, and I can sum it all up in just one word: courage, dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, metal, and G-U-T-S, guts! Why, Ted Striker has got more guts in his little finger than most of us have in out large intestine, including the colon!
* This post has been modified
: 18 years ago
