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WD-40!

Starter: SydneySinbad Posted: 16 years ago Views: 1.2K
#4056650
Lvl 30

A lady got up very early one morning and went outside to pickup the
Sunday paper, she noticed someone had sprayed red paint all around the
sides of the neighbors brand new beige truck. She went over and woke
him up and gave him the bad news. He was, of course extremely upset.
And they stood there trying to figure out what could be done about the
problem. They decided there wasn't much recourse but to wait until
Monday, since nothing was open. Just then another neighbor came out of
his house, surveyed the situation and immediately went to get his WD-40
out and cleaned the red paint off with it. Guess What! It cleaned up
that paint without harming the original paint on the truck! I'm impressed!!
Water Displacement #40. The product began from a search for A rust
preventative solvent and de greaser to protect Missile parts. WD-40 was
created in 1953 by three Technicians at the San Diego Rocket Chemical
Company. Its name comes from the project that was to find a 'water
displacement' compound. They were successful with the fortieth
formulation, thus WD-40. The Corvair Company bought it in bulk to
protect their atlas missile parts.
Ken East (one of the original founders) says there is nothing in WD-40
that would hurt you...' IT IS MADE FROM FISH OIL' . When you read the
'shower door' part, try it. It's the first thing that has ever cleaned
that spotty shower door If yours is plastic, it works just as well as
glass. It is a miracle! Then try it on your stovetop... It is now
shinier than it has ever been before.

1) Protects silver from tarnishing.
2) Removes road tar and grime from cars.
3) Cleans and lubricates guitar strings.
4) Gives floors that `just-waxed` sheen without making it slippery.
5) Keeps flies off cows.
6) Restores and cleans chalkboards.
7) Removes lipstick stains.
8) Loosens stubborn zippers.
9) Untangles jewelry chains.
10) Removes stains from stainless steel sinks.
11) Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill.
12) Keeps ceramic/terra cotta garden pots from oxidizing.
13) Removes tomato stains from clothing.
14) Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots.
15) Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors.
16) Keeps scissors working smoothly.
17) Lubricates noisy door hinges on vehicles and doors in homes
18) It removes black scuff marks from the kitchen floor! Open some windows if you have a lot of marks.
19) Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car. Removed quickly, with WD-40!
20) Gives a children's play gym slide a shine for a super fast slide.
21) Lubricates gear shift on lawn mowers.
22) Rids kids rocking chairs and swings of squeaky noises.
23) Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them easier to open.
24) Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close.
25) Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards in vehicles, well as vinyl bumpers.
26) Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles.
27) Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans.
28) Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons, and bicycles for easy handling.
29) Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them running smoothly.
30) Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other tools.
31) Removes splattered grease on stove.
32) Keeps bathroom mirror from fogging.
33) Lubricates prosthetic limbs.
34) Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell).
35) Removes all traces of duct tape.
36) Folks even spray it on their arms, hands, and knees to relieve arthritis pain
37) Florida's favorite use 'Cleans and removes love bugs from grills and bumpers.'
38) Protects the Statue of Liberty from the elements.
39) WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures and you will be catching the big one in no time.
40) Ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately and stops the itch.
41) WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the mark and wipe with a clean rag.
42) If you've washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and Presto! Lipstick is gone!
43) If you spray WD-40 on the distributor cap, it will displace the moisture and allow the car to start.

Keep a can of WD-40 in your kitchen cabinet. It is good for oven burns or any other type of burn. It takes the burned feeling away and heals with NO scarring.


Remember, the basic ingredient is FISH OIL.
#4056651
Lvl 29
Any decent redneck already knows all that!!




#4056652
Lvl 21
Plenty of WD here!
#4056653
Quote:
Originally posted by rainbowdemon

Any decent redneck already knows all that!!






'Decent' and 'Redneck'.....there's two words that don't appear together in the same sentence very often!!!
#4056654
Lvl 13
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr_Bubbles

...
'Decent' and 'Redneck'.....there's two words that don't appear together in the same sentence very often!!!


i use it for my arthritis just spay a little on your bad joints every day and the pain goes away after a week or so just keep doing it

it really works
#4056655
Lvl 21
Quote:
Originally posted by Mr_Bubbles

'Decent' and 'Redneck'.....there's two words that don't appear together in the same sentence very often!!!


#4056656
Lvl 59
I found this list silly.

So I editorialized a bit.

Quote:
Originally posted by SydneySinbad

1) Protects silver from tarnishing.

It also protects your guests from thinking you're a good host.

2) Removes road tar and grime from cars.
3) Cleans and lubricates guitar strings.

Well, as long as you consider a guitar string coated in WD40 "clean", I guess.

4) Gives floors that `just-waxed` sheen without making it slippery.

Wat? WD40 is a lubricant. How is it not slippery?

5) Keeps flies off cows.

Keeps riders off cows too. You just try and mount a WD-40'd cow. I bet you slide right off.

6) Restores and cleans chalkboards.

Nobody uses chalkboards anymore.

7) Removes lipstick stains.

I'm not putting WB40 on my wiener. Thanks though.

8) Loosens stubborn zippers.

Although people may think you have an oily discharge in the crotchal region.

9) Untangles jewelry chains.

I heard that one time Flava Flav almost got choked to death, but luckily there was some WD-40 to save his life. Kids, beware when wearing a big clock at the end of a gold chain around your neck.

10) Removes stains from stainless steel sinks.

I think someone sold you some crappy stainless steel. Mine doesn't stain. That's the whole point.

11) Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill.

But makes your burgers taste like dirty fish oil.

12) Keeps ceramic/terra cotta garden pots from oxidizing.

Thank GOD! If I had a nickel for every time I went outside and saw my terra cotta garden pots had oxidized and thought, "Gosh, Darnit, if only there were some material that would prevent this stubborn oxidizing!" I'd have zero cents.

13) Removes tomato stains from clothing.

Adds big oil stains to clothing.

14) Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots.
15) Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors.
16) Keeps scissors working smoothly.

All oil does this.

17) Lubricates noisy door hinges on vehicles and doors in homes

Again, I'm glad a product that is marketed as a lubricant lubricates.

18) It removes black scuff marks from the kitchen floor! Open some windows if you have a lot of marks.

Yeah, it makes your kitchen smell like a mechanic's garage. Nice.

19) Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car. Removed quickly, with WD-40! soap and water.

20) Gives a children's play gym slide a shine for a super fast slide.

Gives childrens pants a nice oily-ass and scraped knees as they're shot off of the slide at Mach 2.

21) Lubricates gear shift on lawn mowers.

Another sweet lubricating function of this lubricant. Nice.

22) Rids kids rocking chairs and swings of squeaky noises.

What if the squeaky noise is due to you rocking your chair over a mouse?

23) Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them easier to open.

Lubricating with WD40, who woulda thunk it!?

24) Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close.

Has anyone really ever been flummoxed by the operation of an umbrella? Really? If so, I assume these are the people on airplanes who are the target audience for the seat-belt instructional lecture.


25) Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards in vehicles, well as vinyl bumpers.

Also doubles as a nice air defreshener.

26) Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles.

I can come up with this nonsense too. Cleans and restores the shiny part of your doorstop. Lubricates your toaster-oven door.

27) Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans.

Much more fun: Dropping Junior Mints into your moving electric fan.

Less fun: Explaining to your boss why there are Junior Mints stuck to the fanblades of your electric fan.


28) Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons, and bicycles for easy handling.

Lubricates widgets on your doohickey for easy whatchamacalit.

29) Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them running smoothly.

Lubricates nipples so they don't become chafed on long jogs.

30) Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other tools.

So does keeping water off of them.

31) Removes splattered grease on stove.

Removes splattered blood from your murder scene.

32) Keeps bathroom mirror from fogging.

I spray it on the inside of all my car windows so when I'm fucking a chick in there it doesn't fog up. And again, I get to use the air freshening aspects of WD-40 as well.

33) Lubricates prosthetic limbs.



34) Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell).

Keeps guests off the balcony (they hate the smell).
Keeps guests off the balcony (they slide off, over the railing to their death)

35) Removes all traces of duct tape.

All traces? I bet I could find some. Like, if I looked in the garbage can you threw the discarded duct tape into.

36) Folks even spray it on their arms, hands, and knees to relieve arthritis pain

I spray it on my eyelids to prevent eyelid arthritis and squeakiness. And guess what, IT WORKS. MY EYELIDS DON'T SQUEAK!

37) Florida's favorite use 'Cleans and removes love bugs from grills and bumpers.'

You already used that one. You just put a state in front of it. I call shenanigans.

38) Protects the Statue of Liberty from the elements.

And it takes the bugs off the statue of liberty, right?
BTW, you should probably be more specific about the elements. There are a lot of them, and I bet it wouldn't protect her from, say, Plutonium.

39) WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures and you will be catching the big one in no time.

WD40 repels people. Spray a little on your face or neck and you'll be alone in no time.

40) Ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately and stops the itch.

If you regularly get bitten by ants you probably have bigger problems than itching. Like, for instance, being a fucking idiot.

41) WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the mark and wipe with a clean rag.

WD40 is great for putting oily spots on your walls. Spray on and smear around with a rag. Tada!

42) If you've washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and Presto! Lipstick is gone!

Abracadabra, stinky oily blotches all over your clothes! But hey, at least it ain't lipstick!

43) If you spray WD-40 on the distributor cap, it will displace the moisture and allow the car to start.

If you spray WD-40 up your ass before you have diarrhea it will displace moisture and turn diarrhea into a nicely formed turd. Try it!

Keep a can of WD-40 in your kitchen cabinet. It is good for oven burns or any other type of burn. It takes the burned feeling away and heals with NO scarring.

It's also handy as a prophylactic; spray some on your giblets prior to engaging in sexy acts with a member of the opposite sex. You won't impregnate her/become pregnant. I GUARANTEE IT!




#4056657
Lvl 30
omg, EL, that is even better than my answers. Ty.
#4056658
Lvl 24
i cant believe i read all of that lindros


wtf
#4056659
Quote:
Originally posted by FeFeHumHum

i cant believe i read all of that lindros


wtf
Yeah me either damn he has too much free time but damn was that funny LMAO
#4056660
Lvl 7
WoW, every day's a school day!
#4056661
Lvl 11
Leave it to EL ..He's a real comedian! I'm an over-educated redneck & I use WD-40 for all those things & more. Thanx Guys!