I'm in the worst spot I've been in for a long time.
Those of you who've actually read the thread and read my posts, now know that I got screwed over by a chick. a HOT chick, might I add.
Someone I actually fell for since a long time. And it has been a long time.
anyway, which may not have been really clear about my very incoherent post was that she told me to piss off and didn't want to be my friend. not even "a" friend.
So tonight, I started to plea and beg for mercy. I have feelings for this girl, I really do and it's been too long for me (the feelings, not the sex) to ignore them and move on. So I talk and try and plea and talk more and more.
I'm quite the talkative type

. Pretty good at it too, it I might add.
Anyway, she finally comes clean. Tells me I did have a small chance of winning her over at first and the she enjoyed seeing me in town after six years. Told me it was really nice to see me again since she had a crush on me back then and kinda felt the same.
But the blog I wrote about her didn't quite make her feel that good anymore.
I try to update my personal blog each day and at that specific day (same day I posted here about what went wrong) I totally wrote off all that had happened between me and her in the last few weeks. Ofcourse I tell it from my side of the story, but it now seemed she was totally unamused by it and doesn't feel for me anymore.
So.. I have a chance and don't know about it. I complain I don't have a chance and fuck up the chance I didn't know I had. I beg for mercy and find out I had a chance but no chance anymore.
fucked up shit
I did manage to get a chance of becoming "a" friend. so that's positive. guess I'll have to work from there but fuck, I'm scared she's still fucking with me.
I know a lot of you will prolly say she is. and yes, she might. but I guess my feelings for her are too strong to ignore and let her run of.
please collect my brain if she's still fucking with me, I find out and blow my brains out.
thanks.
CK
* This post has been modified
: 19 years ago