DAY THE PENIS ASKED FOR A RAISE> ***********************************> (if this doesn't make you laugh, nothing will!)> > I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following > reasons:> > I do physical labor.> > I work at great depths.> > I plunge headfirst into everything I do.> > I do not get weekends or public holidays off.> > I work in a damp environment.> > I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.> > I work in high temperatures.> > My work exposes me to possible contagious diseases.> > Sincerely,> > P. Niss> > > THE RESPONSE:> > Dear Mr. Niss,> > After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have > raised, the administration> rejects your request for the following reasons:> > You do not work 8 hours straight.> > You fall asleep after brief work periods.> > You do not always follow the orders of the management team.> > You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting > other locations.> > You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated > in order to start working.> > You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.> > You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as > wearing the correct protective clothing.> > You will retire well before you are 65.> > You are often unable to work double shifts.> > You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have > completed your assigned task.> > And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and > exiting the workplace> carrying two suspicious-looking bags.> > > Sincerely,> > V. Gina> > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------>
