Beer

you know you are a drunkard when:

You drink to forget you drink.

People get drunk by shaking your hand.

You never eat breakfast on an empty stomach.

Beer is the reason you get up every afternoon.

The only drinking problem you have is the two-hands/one-mouth thing.

Your house is so messy because it spins like a top every time you lie down.

You drink to steady yourself, and sometimes you get so steady you can’t move.

You think that drunks are a lot like chess players, only drunk.

You have two personalities: Mr. Responsibility and Mr. I-Think-I’ll-Call-All-My-Old-Girlfriends-While-I'm-Blacked-Out.

You’re so good at “drinking to forget” that you sometimes forget how to walk.

Pink elephants get drunk and they see you. (My favourite!)

You’re stalked by alcoholic vampires.

You wear Hawaiian shirts because it’s tougher to see vomit stains on them.

You were against going to war with Iraq until you found out those poor fuckers aren’t allowed to drink.

MUHAHAHA

ridle:

the one who finds out who the guy on the left is, will get a can of beer from me.
where ever he/she lives. i promise!

(beside DVS)

You wonder why people need friends when you can just sit in a room and drink all day.

The monkey on your back is in rehab.

You need at least one, to get the beer out of the fridge

i wonder why belgium took the german flag and just turned it a bit.
its so obvious!

oh, they rearranged colors too.
now that is clever!

The guy on the photo is ... ¤@%/2!£€½~\>

Sorry.. something wrong with my keyboard....

he looks like DeNiro in Jackie Brown.

he is an australian...

If hes an Aussie, he knows beer I used to drink with a Aussie, fucker would buy a 6 pack of Foster's to start out, the big oil can, the beer wasn't the best but those cans could be used for jack stands when you had a flat. then they screwed that by going to Aluminum. I come from a very German family and I thought we could drink, but every Aussie I've ever met was a beer keg on legs. I'm drinking beer right now, come to think of it most times I'm online here I have beer. The American comic Jeff Foxworthy summed it up best when he said " All a man whants Is a cold beer and to see women naked" No bitch here